Third places

[SuperSpreader]

I've been hearing more and more about Third Spaces, I think this article is a great summary on the issue we're seeing and probably why everyone is so reactionary

 

What is a third place, and why has it practically disappeared?

WWW.INTHEKNOW.COM

---

In the 1980s, sociologist Ray Oldenburg coined the term "third place" to describe a physical location aside from your home or workplace that facilitates social interaction. One woman on TikTok...

 

[Jason]

There's a reason dense cities are pretty much always liberal and suburban/rural places skew conservative.

 

Also saw a good point recently about how the death of third places in suburbia is how you wound up with man caves/basement bars/etc. People desperately trying to replicate these distinct places.

 

Quote

In advocating for increased time spent in a physical third place, one teacher argues that we must also acknowledge the socioeconomic barriers many teenagers face in accessing them today, largely due to capitalism.

 

It's not capitalism, it's car dependency and stranger danger bullshit. You're fucked if you're too young to drive and you live in some suburban hellscape where you need your parents to drive you to anything worth doing.

[CayceG]

It IS, in fact, capitalism. 

 

For the longest time I had two Third Spaces: a morning coffee shop downtown, and a bodega/cafe I'd hang with friends on saturday nights. The owner of the coffee shop closed it and rented the building out to some fancy developer who turned it into a cigar/whisky bar. The bodega was purchased by a developer, closed, and turned into luxury apartments. 

[Chris-]

9 hours ago, Jason said:

There's a reason dense cities are pretty much always liberal and suburban/rural places skew conservative.

 

Also saw a good point recently about how the death of third places in suburbia is how you wound up with man caves/basement bars/etc. People desperately trying to replicate these distinct places.

 

 

It's not capitalism, it's car dependency and stranger danger bullshit. You're fucked if you're too young to drive and you live in some suburban hellscape where you need your parents to drive you to anything worth doing.

 

My man that suburban hellscape was designed for explicitly capitalistic ends, it absolutely is capitalism. 

[MarSolo]

I need my third space when it starts getting warm. Winter time? Forget it. I’ll stay in on weekends when it’s cold and text friends.

 

But yeah, this is the reason I love living in the city. I don’t drive and don’t ever intend on adding a car to my list of expenses.

[TheLeon]

Too many spaces. I’m trying to get down to one. 

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

Maybe stop thinking about third spaces and start thinking about that empty, Jesus-shaped space in your heart. 

[Jason]

6 hours ago, CayceG said:

It IS, in fact, capitalism. 

 

For the longest time I had two Third Spaces: a morning coffee shop downtown, and a bodega/cafe I'd hang with friends on saturday nights. The owner of the coffee shop closed it and rented the building out to some fancy developer who turned it into a cigar/whisky bar. The bodega was purchased by a developer, closed, and turned into luxury apartments. 

 

6 hours ago, Chris- said:

My man that suburban hellscape was designed for explicitly capitalistic ends, it absolutely is capitalism. 

 

Modern American suburbia came about because of decades of government policy engineering that had a number of factors behind it, including the fact that car dependence was explicitly a means of segregation (black people --> likely to be poor --> can't own a car if you're poor --> can't get from the cities to the suburbs). Not an organic market shift toward preferring suburbia.

[SuperSpreader]

6 minutes ago, Jason said:

 

 

Modern American suburbia came about because of decades of government policy engineering that had a number of factors behind it, including the fact that car dependence was explicitly a means of segregation (black people --> likely to be poor --> can't own a car if you're poor --> can't get from the cities to the suburbs). Not an organic market shift toward preferring suburbia.

 

100% this. The situation here is manufactured, conservatives act like investment in city infrastructure is anything different than the investments they got. 

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

26 minutes ago, Jason said:

 

 

Modern American suburbia came about because of decades of government policy engineering that had a number of factors behind it, including the fact that car dependence was explicitly a means of segregation (black people --> likely to be poor --> can't own a car if you're poor --> can't get from the cities to the suburbs). Not an organic market shift toward preferring suburbia.

I mean also American capitalism is the other side of the same coin here, with General Motors and big oil more than willing to go along with and profit from this racial caste system. 

[Uaarkson]

6 minutes ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

I mean also American capitalism is the other side of the same coin here, with General Motors and big oil more than willing to go along with and profit from this racial caste system. 

I mean they went as far as to buy out the Detroit streetcar network and replace it with their own fleet of busses. They didn’t give a fuck about what cars were doing to society.

[chakoo]

3 hours ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

Maybe stop thinking about third spaces and start thinking about that empty, Jesus-shaped space in your heart. 

 

Yeah but it's an infinite hole that can't be filled which means tons of space to fill it instead with booze, drugs, hookers and retro video games. 

[SuperSpreader]

42 minutes ago, Uaarkson said:

I mean they went as far as to buy out the Detroit streetcar network and replace it with their own fleet of busses. They didn’t give a fuck about what cars were doing to society.

Ppl really bought the car = freedom propaganda 

[SuperSpreader]

Just now, SuperSpreader said:

Ppl really bought the car = freedom propaganda 

 

Having said that, I really like the Volvo S60 

 

 

 

 

 

[Greatoneshere]

So . . . is it third space or third place? 

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

4 minutes ago, SuperSpreader said:

Ppl really bought the car = freedom propaganda 

When you build your entire society around everyone needing a car to be a productive member of society…. It is

[SuperSpreader]

Just now, Greatoneshere said:

So . . . is it third space or third place? 

Third base

[Jason]

3 minutes ago, Greatoneshere said:

So . . . is it third space or third place? 

 

Quote

In sociology, the third place refers to the social surroundings that are separate from the two usual social environments of home ("first place") and the workplace ("second place").

 

[unogueen]

That used to be the block. And having non-incorporated loose areas to spit shit was definitely a defining portion of my life. Just the sheer amount of Street Fighter 2 cabinets that inhabited basically any business with the room for a cab meant that social gatherings were largely spontaneous. A lot like a private multiplayer server with a good set of regulars and cool staff. Or the fact that Toronto had a very healthy coffee culture where night-dwellers of all kinds would just shoot the shit like it's a bar, which of course were independently owned. Timmys and Starbucks want that fast turnaround though.

[TUFKAK]

My anecdotal interaction with this is the gym. 
 

During lockdown when I lost access to it not only did I miss the workouts, I managed to find a garage gym I trained at in Walnut Creek, but I massively missed the actual space of the gym. I learned then how much I had become dependent on the actual physical space itself, not just the training. Thankfully gyms are back now but considering how much i was mentally impacted by not having it I can 100% believe losing these spaces are bad for society.

[SuperSpreader]

 

Sort of interesting that ppl will pay to go to Disney/Vegas to experience what they could have in their cities if they'd stop voting against it. 

 

 

[Fizzzzle]

Insulating yourself from all people is bad for your brain, and I say that as a certified introvert. When you live in an isolated suburban home, drive in your isolated metal box to work in your isolated cube only to go back home, it melts your brain.

 

Having somewhere that you can just relax and be around other people does wonders for things like... I dunno, empathy. It does good for the soul to realize you're not the main character in a movie.

[Zaku3]

On 4/8/2023 at 9:14 AM, CayceG said:

It IS, in fact, capitalism. 

 

For the longest time I had two Third Spaces: a morning coffee shop downtown, and a bodega/cafe I'd hang with friends on saturday nights. The owner of the coffee shop closed it and rented the building out to some fancy developer who turned it into a cigar/whisky bar. The bodega was purchased by a developer, closed, and turned into luxury apartments. 

 

Ya we live in a capitalist society. It is by definition our main problem.

 

It's not the lack of religion per say. It's the decline in a central place where people in the community could socialize. Today is Easter so Church's will be packed. That every Sunday 1 hour mass grind means every week you see members of your community. 

 

Stories like this and I am sure plenty of other occured before the pandemic. However the pandemic changed alot. Aside from the dead and retired. Alot of people got to live more fullfilling lives by being at home. The "We won't ever work from home." changed to "We have to.". People either worked, didn't work, or worked from home. The bad thing was people getting sick, deaths, and not being able to go out and hang out basically. So like the plague hurt fuedalism, this one has hurt capitalism. 

 

Our society is too focused on the individual at the expense of the collective. I feel it causes a lack of meaning and love in our lives. 

[Zaku3]

1 hour ago, Fizzzzle said:

Insulating yourself from all people is bad for your brain, and I say that as a certified introvert. When you live in an isolated suburban home, drive in your isolated metal box to work in your isolated cube only to go back home, it melts your brain.

 

Having somewhere that you can just relax and be around other people does wonders for things like... I dunno, empathy. It does good for the soul to realize you're not the main character in a movie.

 

I thought I was an introvert all my life but I think I'm an extrovert actually.

 

My actions are of someone that likes to be alone but it's more of I see like going to the movies, vacations, sight seeing, etc as social activities. If I'm by myself I'd rather read, study, hobby, etc.

[5timechamp]

5 hours ago, Fizzzzle said:

Insulating yourself from all people is bad for your brain, and I say that as a certified introvert. When you live in an isolated suburban home, drive in your isolated metal box to work in your isolated cube only to go back home, it melts your brain.

 

Having somewhere that you can just relax and be around other people does wonders for things like... I dunno, empathy. It does good for the soul to realize you're not the main character in a movie.

 

yup, that is whats killing me right now... I just retired military, I enjoyed what I did so in a sense work was "play" it was my social outlet... now as I sit here purposeless I went from working 19 hr days as a DS constantly moving and talking to just doing nothing... just sitting home with pent up energy. I keep thinking of places to volunteer or work to be useful but as an introvert just the thought of establishing something new is killing my will to move...  Sometimes I think im over thinking it and that im actually social, but the reality is just the prospect of going out for "fun" is in itself exhausting...  

[Zaku3]

25 minutes ago, 5timechamp said:

 

yup, that is whats killing me right now... I just retired military, I enjoyed what I did so in a sense work was "play" it was my social outlet... now as I sit here purposeless I went from working 19 hr days as a DS constantly moving and talking to just doing nothing... just sitting home with pent up energy. I keep thinking of places to volunteer or work to be useful but as an introvert just the thought of establishing something new is killing my will to move...  Sometimes I think im over thinking it and that im actually social, but the reality is just the prospect of going out for "fun" is in itself exhausting...  

 

Need to find a balance in your case. However you won't find it by overthinking. Overthinking can be okay but if you ever find yourself just going in circles mentally it might be something else. Life feels so easy now however I do think something was wrong with me physically. Just the meds alone brought a profound change. I could have figured out my life on my own in theory. I just could never make decisions on my own. I'm not sure why. Still trying to figure it out. 

 

If you do find your mind just runs in circles and you can't really make decisions and stick to them then maybe xanax. It helped alot and was the first step in breaking down and deciding I need help. I did the lowest dose one a night and the difference in my mood was good. If you feel you can't improve your life without help get a therapist. You aren't working right now so it's a good time to see a therapist and get started on meds if needed. 

[5timechamp]

22 minutes ago, Zaku3 said:

If you do find your mind just runs in circles and you can't really make decisions and stick to them then maybe xanax. It helped alot and was the first step in breaking down and deciding I need help. I did the lowest dose one a night and the difference in my mood was good. If you feel you can't improve your life without help get a therapist. You aren't working right now so it's a good time to see a therapist and get started on meds if needed. 

 

Yup, overthinking is the word… I definitely have started looking for a counselor just to air all the excess crap in my head… sitting around getting contaminated by the vitriol of everything certainly isnt helpful… I have a sleep machine and all that but it doesnt seem to be having much effect.. I figure once I settle into whats next things should settle down… its the “first day of school” syndrome thats crippling me 

[finaljedi]

7 hours ago, SuperSpreader said:

 

Sort of interesting that ppl will pay to go to Disney/Vegas to experience what they could have in their cities if they'd stop voting against it. 

 

 

 

These things weird me out, they've built a couple near me and I just hate them.  It's like this movie set video game scale tiny city.  They're plopping another one down near me that is going to have second locations for restaurants that are found down in the sort of trendy part of Cincinnati.  So if you want to eat like you're in the city but don't want to be around... some kinds of people, good news, you can just park your car at the edge of tiny town and get some overpriced street tacos.  The one kind of near me even has a little extra sales tax bump for the businesses within it.

[unogueen]

2 hours ago, 5timechamp said:

 

Yup, overthinking is the word… I definitely have started looking for a counselor just to air all the excess crap in my head… sitting around getting contaminated by the vitriol of everything certainly isnt helpful… I have a sleep machine and all that but it doesnt seem to be having much effect.. I figure once I settle into whats next things should settle down… its the “first day of school” syndrome thats crippling me 

You can always semi-retire. My foreman when I did roofing was a physics professor. I also met a few retirees when attending adult school.

[SuperSpreader]