People on FB are saying my husband was a predator

[CastlevaniaNut18]

Because we started dating when I was 17 years and 6 months and he was 20 years and 9 months. 
 

Sometimes I love to get them going. I mean, what goes on in these peoples’ minds? 

Personally speaking what’s your line? 

 

[Paperclyp]

What? How the hell did that get started? 

 

Time to delete FB. 

 

I hope it isn't causing you too much distress. 

[Derek]

Yeah. Sounds like something got then fired up.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

3 minutes ago, Paperclyp said:

What? How the hell did that get started? 

 

Time to delete FB. 

 

I hope it isn't causing you too much distress. 

Haha, it was a public comments section regarding and article on Ashton Kutcher. Lot of discussion and some similar comments were made and I jumped in because I was bored. 
 

It’s not the first time. I promise it isn’t upsetting. Just a slow night at work. 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

4 minutes ago, Derek said:

Yeah. Sounds like something got then fired up.

Dude, it’s the internet. It doesn’t take much to get keyboard warriors in a fighting mood. 

[Paperclyp]

6 minutes ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Haha, it was a public comments section regarding and article on Ashton Kutcher. Lot of discussion and some similar comments were made and I jumped in because I was bored. 
 

It’s not the first time. I promise it isn’t upsetting. Just a slow night at work. 

 

Oh good, I was envisioning like a group of general people you kinda knew talkin shit. 

 

To answer your question,  I've certainly known some level-headed 17 year olds who are more mature than like a few 21 or older people I've known. I would need a lot of context before I dubbed a guy a predator. I do find it odd if like a guy in college without specific connection or something to a high school junior or whatever is actively pursuing someone like that from scratch. But yeah I would just need context to decide. 

[Biggie]

Ridiculous. 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

1 minute ago, Paperclyp said:

 

Oh good, I was envisioning like a group of general people you kinda knew talkin shit. 

No, thank goodness, lol. I mean, my dad did kinda raise his eyebrows when he came to the house for our first date, but I guess his geeky demeanor didn’t seem like much of a threat.  

 

Fun fact: we met thanks to his roommate being someone I knew from high school who was also dating my classmate and friend. He said he had a couple girls in mind, so he gave their MSN messenger profiles to him. He looked at the other girl and saw she was 14(!) and was noped out real quick. Asked his roommate wtf he was thinking and dude was like “oh shit, I didn’t realize she was that young.” I still don’t know how that happened but his roomie was kind of an airhead. He was still a little hesitant on me, but we hit it off and the rest was history. 
 

 

Also, I sometimes feel a little disaffected by my fellow progressives. Like, I’m not near as left-wing as I thought, but sometimes I’m okay with that. 

[Bacon]

 

 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

11 minutes ago, Bacon said:

 

 

I mean, maybe if he were in his late 20s or older and pursuing someone just below 18. There’s a definite creep factor there. 

[Bacon]

Just now, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

I mean, maybe if he were in his late 20s or older and pursuing someone just below 18. There’s a definite creep factor there. 

Oh sure. It's just the way you worded your OP reminded me of this. Usually, the image is used to defend not good things.

 

In this specific case, I thought it was pretty funny.

[Keyser_Soze]

Dang what a cradle robber!

[TUFKAK]

Just remind them Paul Walker was 33 when he met his wife who was 16 at the time.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

19 minutes ago, TUFKAK said:

Just remind them Paul Walker was 33 when he met his wife who was 16 at the time.

Ewww, I forgot about that. But to be fair, these sorts don’t seem to make an exception for celebs. I forget the exact couple, but it was some article weeks back I commented on where they were all up in arms over some celebrities dating where the gap was 19 and 16. 

[Keyser_Soze]

26 minutes ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

 I forget the exact couple, but it was some article weeks back I commented on where they were all up in arms over some celebrities dating where the gap was 19 and 16. 

 

Are you sure you're not thinking of the Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis thing where he said she was 14 and he was 19?

[CastlevaniaNut18]

4 minutes ago, Keyser_Soze said:

 

Are you sure you're not thinking of the Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis thing where he said she was 14 and he was 19?

No, this was something else, before all the stuff with the Masterton sentencing. It was definitely 19 and 16. 

[TUFKAK]

54 minutes ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Ewww, I forgot about that. But to be fair, these sorts don’t seem to make an exception for celebs. I forget the exact couple, but it was some article weeks back I commented on where they were all up in arms over some celebrities dating where the gap was 19 and 16. 

I don’t know, chuds love that franchise and have basically made him a martyr.

[TUFKAK]

Obligatory 

 

 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

12 minutes ago, TUFKAK said:

I don’t know, chuds love that franchise and have basically made him a martyr.

These are liberals, tho. 

[TUFKAK]

1 minute ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

These are liberals, tho. 

Them too

[best3444]

Your husband is definitely a creep.

 

 

Playin.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

1 hour ago, best3444 said:

Your husband is definitely a creep.

 

 

Playin.

Goddammit, that’s all I needed to hear. 
 

I’m asking for a divorce. 

[TUFKAK]

15 minutes ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Goddammit, that’s all I needed to hear. 
 

I’m asking for a divorce. 

You’re 5’ so if you’re taking numbers you can be in my rotation. Just don’t tell my gf, she’ll kill us both.

[TUFKAK]

Don’t fuck with jersey girls, bitches are crazy 

[best3444]

On a side note, I find 18 not a suitable age to be an adult. I believe they should raise it to 21. 18 you're just a child and clueless. Technically, I didn't feel like an adult until 35 lol. 

[TheLeon]

With zero other context, those numbers might get a quick eyebrow raise from me, but wouldn’t be a red flag. For me, I was basically the same loser at 20 that I was at 17, so I’m not sure it would’ve been a big deal. 

[best3444]

17 and 20 is absolutely fine. 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

15 minutes ago, best3444 said:

On a side note, I find 18 not a suitable age to be an adult. I believe they should raise it to 21. 18 you're just a child and clueless. Technically, I didn't feel like an adult until 35 lol. 

Sort of? I mean, 18 seems like a kind of arbitrary number. You’re mature enough to enlist to go fight and die for your country but not mature enough to have a beer? But it’s also okay to take out a hundred thousand dollars in student loans you may never be able to pay back?

 

We know the frontal lobe isn’t even fully developed until your mid 20s. 
 

I dunno where I draw a hard line but there are a lot of inconsistencies there. 
 

 

But for real, I wanna ask these people what would have really changed in 6 months to make it okay for my husband to date me? What tangible maturity gains would I have made in my remaining 3 months of high school and the summer before starting college? 

[Keyser_Soze]

5 minutes ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Sort of? I mean, 18 seems like a kind of arbitrary number. You’re mature enough to enlist to go fight and die for your country but not mature enough to have a beer? But it’s also okay to take out a hundred thousand dollars in student loans you may never be able to pay back?

 

We know the frontal lobe isn’t even fully developed until your mid 20s. 
 

I dunno where I draw a hard line but there are a lot of inconsistencies there.

 

You can buy a porno mag but not enjoy a beer with it as well!

[LazyPiranha]

With an age gap that relatively small, I think it comes down more to behavior that anything else.  We used to call people who graduated but still came back to hit on the younger girls crater scrapers because they were either creeps or because no woman their age was interested in them.  When you’re 19 and hitting on the 15-16 year olds who are amazed you have a car, then you’re just weird.  
 

I don’t know what is pin down the number to, but once you have no valid reason to be in the high school sphere, if you’re reinserting yourself into it I’d say you’ve entered creep territory.  One of my best friends was a year below me in high school, and once he was out I never had anything to do with that place ever again.  I moved at the same time which certainly made it easier, but even if I was still around there isn’t a chance in hell I’d be going in those circles for anything.  Your situation is different than that, so I’d say it doesn’t apply, but given the same age gap and a different setup?  Sure. 

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

Age/2 + 7 tells me it’s fine

[CastlevaniaNut18]

8 hours ago, LazyPiranha said:

With an age gap that relatively small, I think it comes down more to behavior that anything else.  We used to call people who graduated but still came back to hit on the younger girls crater scrapers because they were either creeps or because no woman their age was interested in them.  When you’re 19 and hitting on the 15-16 year olds who are amazed you have a car, then you’re just weird.  
 

I don’t know what is pin down the number to, but once you have no valid reason to be in the high school sphere, if you’re reinserting yourself into it I’d say you’ve entered creep territory.  One of my best friends was a year below me in high school, and once he was out I never had anything to do with that place ever again.  I moved at the same time which certainly made it easier, but even if I was still around there isn’t a chance in hell I’d be going in those circles for anything.  Your situation is different than that, so I’d say it doesn’t apply, but given the same age gap and a different setup?  Sure. 

Yeah, I was in my last three months of high school and couldn’t wait to be done with it. Might have been a bit different if I were a junior and 17. I’m an August birthday, so I was always one of the youngest in my class. 

[stepee]

If they are actually arguing with you about it that is ridiculous as it’s essentially arguing with someone that they are a victim.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

47 minutes ago, stepee said:

If they are actually arguing with you about it that is ridiculous as it’s essentially arguing with someone that they are a victim.

Yeah, it feels weird having strangers tell me I was victimized/preyed on. "He was the adult, he dated a child. It was his job as an adult not to date a child." Because boy, that 6 months really mad a difference in my development. I mean, if I saw a 30 year old man starting a relationship with a 17 year old, that would actually be a different story.

[TUFKAK]

7 hours ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Yeah, it feels weird having strangers tell me I was victimized/preyed on. "He was the adult, he dated a child. It was his job as an adult not to date a child." Because boy, that 6 months really mad a difference in my development. I mean, if I saw a 30 year old man starting a relationship with a 17 year old, that would actually be a different story.

Listen, we can’t trust women to know what to do with their own bodies and choices; you have to be told! We just covered this in a recent thread dude gosh!