Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 29, 2023 Share Posted January 29, 2023 You can keep your Greek/Roman/Norse myths - Egyptian mythology pwns them all! From the Contendings of Horus and Set: Quote "Now afterward, (at) evening time, bed was prepared for them, and they both lay down. But during the night, Set caused his phallus to become stiff and inserted it between Horus's thighs. Then Horus placed his hands between his thighs and received Set's semen. Horus went to tell his mother Isis: "Help me, Isis, my mother, come and see what Set has done to me." And he opened his hand(s) and let her see Set's semen. She let out a loud shriek, seized the copper (knife), cut off his hand(s) that were equivalent. Then she fetched some fragrant ointment and applied it to Horus's phallus. She caused it to become stiff and inserted it into a pot, and he caused his semen to flow down into it." "Isis at morning time went carrying the semen of Horus to the garden of Set and said to Set's gardener: "What sort of vegetable is it that Set eats here in your company?" So the gardener told her: "He doesn't eat any vegetable here in my company except lettuce." And Isis added the semen of Horus onto it. Set returned according to his daily habit and ate the lettuce, which he regularly ate. Thereupon he became pregnant with the semen of Horus" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bacon Posted January 29, 2023 Share Posted January 29, 2023 nah they got furry gods Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr.Vic20 Posted January 29, 2023 Share Posted January 29, 2023 How would you like to be the responder on that domestic? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keyser_Soze Posted January 29, 2023 Share Posted January 29, 2023 Imagine the hieroglyphics of this story 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Posted January 29, 2023 Share Posted January 29, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheShader Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 Loki turned into a female horse in order to get banged by another horse. Are you saying this tops that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 30, 2023 Author Share Posted January 30, 2023 18 minutes ago, TheShader said: Loki turned into a female horse in order to get banged by another horse. Are you saying this tops that? This makes that look totally mundane in comparison. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheShader Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 Gettin that horse dick is a mundane everyday task in Wade's life, you heard it here first! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 30, 2023 Author Share Posted January 30, 2023 In Egyptian mythology, life was created because a god decided to rub one out: Quote "I had union with my hand, and I embraced my shadow in a love embrace; I poured seed into my own mouth, and I sent forth from myself issue in the form of the gods Šw and Tfnt" - Atum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fizzzzle Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 There's a story to be told about how pagan religions are for the most part like "idk dude shit just happens I guess" vs. how monotheistic religions insist on placing meaning in suffering. Like, not all pagan societies have been egalitarian, but 100% of monotheistic societies place value on the status quo and your suffering in life is directly proportional to your reward in the afterlife. I don't think I'm the one to tell that story, but someone should. Like in this story. It's just like "I don't know, we were chilling and dude just came in my butt.' I'm 14 and this is deep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brick Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 "I had union with my hand" might be my new favourite euphemism for jerking off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unogueen Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 There seems to be a gulf about eastern knowledge around intelligentsia around here. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperSpreader Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b_m_b_m_b_m Posted February 7, 2023 Share Posted February 7, 2023 the romans coopted this and now we have caesar dressing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted February 7, 2023 Share Posted February 7, 2023 Someone needs to recreate this on the Hub now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gamer.tv Posted February 7, 2023 Share Posted February 7, 2023 ‘Lettuce eat some of your semen’ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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