What are your dating red flags?

[Nokra]

31 minutes ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

I drive a truck and work in the city. 😑

 

And the size of your dick is also legendary.

 

 

 

 

 

 

But seriously, no insult intended to you or anyone else that drives a truck, of course.  You probably use your truck for purposes beyond just as a commuter (e.g. outdoorsy stuff, like hunting, in rougher terrain, hauling things, etc.). When I used that as an exaggerated example, I was picturing very specifically the people who drive a giant-ass lifted pickup and never haul anything with it, have an annoying as shit muffler on it that makes everyone else suffer, tie their identity too much to the truck, etc. I doubt that's you, right? 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

17 minutes ago, Nokra said:

 

And the size of your dick is also legendary.

 

 

 

 

 

 

But seriously, no insult intended to you or anyone else that drives a truck, of course.  You probably use your truck for purposes beyond just as a commuter (e.g. outdoorsy stuff, like hunting, in rougher terrain, hauling things, etc.). When I used that as an exaggerated example, I was picturing very specifically the people who drive a giant-ass lifted pickup and never haul anything with it, have an annoying as shit muffler on it that makes everyone else suffer, tie their identity too much to the truck, etc. I doubt that's you, right? 

Definitely not. I drive a Chevy Colorado Z71. I’ll always want 4WD, but I don’t see myself ever getting anything more than a midsize crew cab. 

[Keyser_Soze]

Trucks should be banned from drive thrus

[Kamusha]

9 hours ago, Fizzzzle said:

Not the worst thing in the world. Certainly better that than "I'm fInE tO dRiVe iKnOw tHe RoAd"

 

As soon as someone ascribes any inherent value to driving, they've lost me.

 

I don't drive because I got into a really bad accident and now it plays over and over again in my head whenever I get behind the wheel. I essentially don't drive because of PTSD. One of my best friends can't drive because he has epilepsy. And I also have one friend who pretty much chooses not to drive because she also had 2 DUIs and she would rather give up driving than drinking.

 

I left out some details but it was less about her ability to drive and more that she clearly had a an issue with controlling her alcohol. She was still trying to earn back her license but seemed to get drunk quite often still. We went on a couple dates and the sexual chemistry was certainly there but I couldn't really see myself with her long term.

[Kamusha]

8 hours ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

I thought you were into guys. No judgement, but are you bi/pan? I just recall thinking before you came out as trans, you identified as a gay dude. 

 

Before I fully realized who I was it was also difficult to understand what I wanted and needed out of a relationship. I think I was always bi/pan but it was something I unintentionally repressed for so long as I was still discovering myself. I am attracted to different types of people but prefer to do date women or feminine identifying people at the moment. It's possible I'm just in a girl-crazy phase as I make up for the all the years I wasn't interested in women at all. 

[Fizzzzle]

6 minutes ago, Kamusha said:

 

Before I fully realized who I was it was also difficult to understand what I wanted and needed out of a relationship. I think I was always bi/pan but it was something I unintentionally repressed for so long as I was still discovering myself. I am attracted to different types of people but prefer to do date women or feminine identifying people at the moment. It's possible I'm just in a girl-crazy phase as I make up for the all the years I wasn't interested in women at all. 

Hey if you're anything like me, you kind of yo-yo. I spent almost 5 years with my ex, then I spent about a year being with people who were pretty much the opposite of her. Even one trans person for a little bit.

 

Fuck who you want to fuck as long as they're a consenting adult and don't let anyone try to label you.

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

15 hours ago, Fizzzzle said:

WE'RE NOT TRYING TO BAN CARS, FOR FUCKS SAKE

Thought you could get away with saying this cause I wasn’t here well guess what: I am

[Fizzzzle]

2 hours ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

Thought you could get away with saying this cause I wasn’t here well guess what: I am

The hero we need.

 

I love that I still see "but what about those of us who live in rural areas?" WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT YOU

[CastlevaniaNut18]

9 hours ago, Kamusha said:

 

Before I fully realized who I was it was also difficult to understand what I wanted and needed out of a relationship. I think I was always bi/pan but it was something I unintentionally repressed for so long as I was still discovering myself. I am attracted to different types of people but prefer to do date women or feminine identifying people at the moment. It's possible I'm just in a girl-crazy phase as I make up for the all the years I wasn't interested in women at all. 

I sort of know the feeling. I adore my husband and things are great between us, but if I were single, I’d probably be all over the women now. He’s left the door open for me to get some female experience if I want. I’m just socially awkward and don’t know how to approach that. 😩

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

2 hours ago, Fizzzzle said:

The hero we need.

 

I love that I still see "but what about those of us who live in rural areas?" WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT YOU

I am. Most people in rural areas (especially east of the Mississippi) are not far from a small town if it were safe to bike or whatever else there for most errands. 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

13 minutes ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

I am. Most people in rural areas (especially east of the Mississippi) are not far from a small town if it were safe to bike or whatever else there for most errands. 

Wat 

 

I grew up in a small town, living on the outskirts. It’s a few miles to the closest grocery store. Elderly folks supposed to bike that far?

 

Husband’s hometown is even worse. All they have is a Dollar General and the nearest town is 10 miles up the highway. 

[Keyser_Soze]

1 hour ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

 It’s a few miles to the closest grocery store. Elderly folks supposed to bike that far?

 

If you got legs or arms you can pedal. Maybe they could even use a recumbent bike.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

2 minutes ago, Keyser_Soze said:

 

If you got legs or arms you can pedal. Maybe they could even use a recumbent bike.

Yeah, that’s not happening with my 83 year old grandmother. Nevermind how you’re supposed to carry sacks of groceries on a bike. 
 

You also removed the whole section about where my husband grew up. 
 

As someone who spent the first 25 years of my life in rural areas, this is absolutely not practical for tons of people. 

[Keyser_Soze]

Just now, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Yeah, that’s not happening with my 83 year old grandmother. Nevermind how you’re supposed to carry sacks of groceries on a bike. 
 

You also removed the whole section about where my husband grew up. 
 

As someone who spent the first 25 years of my life in rural areas, this is absolutely not practical for tons of people. 

 

Look I'm just trying to score points with @b_m_b_m_b_m now that he's back.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

Fair enough  

[CastlevaniaNut18]

Somewhat related, my family recently had to take my other grandma’s keys away from her. She’s 87 and dementia is taking hold and I don’t think she’s far from a nursing home. She’s still very much aware and stubborn enough to put up a fight and it’s been hard on her. She wants so badly to maintain her independence but it’s simply not safe for her to drive anymore. 
 

The 83 year old is doing better. She’s fully independent and mostly sticks to driving in town. She hates driving to the nearest city(something like 80k population) and usually just goes straight to my aunt’s place and has her chauffeur her around to doctors appointments and such. 

[Jason]

4 hours ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Somewhat related, my family recently had to take my other grandma’s keys away from her. She’s 87 and dementia is taking hold and I don’t think she’s far from a nursing home. She’s still very much aware and stubborn enough to put up a fight and it’s been hard on her. She wants so badly to maintain her independence but it’s simply not safe for her to drive anymore. 
 

The 83 year old is doing better. She’s fully independent and mostly sticks to driving in town. She hates driving to the nearest city(something like 80k population) and usually just goes straight to my aunt’s place and has her chauffeur her around to doctors appointments and such. 

 

My grandpa veered into needing his keys taken away at the end but into his late 80s he was good to drive in limited circumstances. Immediate vicinity, only driving in daylight, etc.

 

For him the hard part wasn't dementia, it was his body failing him as he got too old. It honestly felt worse than my grandmother getting eaten by dementia because with him he knew exactly what was happening and was just a prisoner as his body got worse. For example he really liked walking and eventually couldn't really do that. He really liked reading and that lasted him past having to cut down on the walking but then eventually even with a magnifying glass he couldn't see the page. Eventually he was just stuck in his body, mostly lucid, but unable to do anything he enjoyed.

[Jason]

11 hours ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

Thought you could get away with saying this cause I wasn’t here well guess what: I am

 

I'm not looking to ban people driving smart sensible cars like Fiat 500s and Smart ForTwos if they absolutely have to but I'm definitely looking to ban driving pickup trucks in pedestrian areas.

[CastlevaniaNut18]

6 minutes ago, Jason said:

 

My grandpa veered into needing his keys taken away at the end but into his late 80s he was good to drive in limited circumstances. Immediate vicinity, only driving in daylight, etc.

 

For him the hard part wasn't dementia, it was his body failing him as he got too old. It honestly felt worse than my grandmother getting eaten by dementia because with him he knew exactly what was happening and was just a prisoner as his body got worse. For example he really liked walking and eventually couldn't really do that. He really liked reading and that lasted him past having to cut down on the walking but then eventually even with a magnifying glass he couldn't see the page. Eventually he was just stuck in his body, mostly lucid, but unable to do anything he enjoyed.

My dad works ER and he recently got a patient who had driven two hours from what was supposed to be a grocery trip in Memphis and ended up in their podunk town. His family had put out a Silver Alert on him. That’s what we’re worried about with my grandma. 
 

My grandpa died at 87 and he was on the verge of having his keys taken away because his eyesight had gotten so bad. He was just driving in daylight hours to town by the end. 

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

9 hours ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Yeah, that’s not happening with my 83 year old grandmother. Nevermind how you’re supposed to carry sacks of groceries on a bike. 
 

You also removed the whole section about where my husband grew up. 
 

As someone who spent the first 25 years of my life in rural areas, this is absolutely not practical for tons of people. 

If I’m banning cars there’s absolutely a place for a good paratransit system.  It’s expensive (but so are cars!) but also most old people shouldn’t be driving multi thousand pound cars anyway. 
 

or wal mart scooters that blast “Ridin dirty” when in operation would be cool too 

 

but again if I can ban cars we can reorient the whole of society so that people who don’t need to live in the sticks (where I grew up too) and need a car won’t have to

[best3444]

@b_m_b_m_b_m welcome back!

[CastlevaniaNut18]

17 minutes ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

If I’m banning cars there’s absolutely a place for a good paratransit system.  It’s expensive (but so are cars!) but also most old people shouldn’t be driving multi thousand pound cars anyway. 
 

or wal mart scooters that blast “Ridin dirty” when in operation would be cool too 

 

but again if I can ban cars we can reorient the whole of society so that people who don’t need to live in the sticks (where I grew up too) and need a car won’t have to

Well, you dream big dreams, I’ll give you that.  

[Keyser_Soze]

28 minutes ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

If I’m banning cars there’s absolutely a place for a good paratransit system.  It’s expensive (but so are cars!) but also most old people shouldn’t be driving multi thousand pound cars anyway. 
 

or wal mart scooters that blast “Ridin dirty” when in operation would be cool too 

 

but again if I can ban cars we can reorient the whole of society so that people who don’t need to live in the sticks (where I grew up too) and need a car won’t have to

 

Does this mean you don't have a recumbent bike?

[gamer.tv]

14 hours ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

I sort of know the feeling. I adore my husband and things are great between us, but if I were single, I’d probably be all over the women now. He’s left the door open for me to get some female experience if I want. I’m just socially awkward and don’t know how to approach that. 😩

I think we’ve all been very mature and not made too much of the last two sentence. I don’t know if I’d be that OK - I mean, surface level yes - just for the idea, but, like most things, the reality would most likely get to me.

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

1 hour ago, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

Well, you dream big dreams, I’ll give you that.  

It’s my red flag

 

48 minutes ago, Keyser_Soze said:

 

Does this mean you don't have a recumbent bike?

I do not have one. 

[CastlevaniaNut18]

10 minutes ago, gamer.tv said:

I think we’ve all been very mature and not made too much of the last two sentence. I don’t know if I’d be that OK - I mean, surface level yes - just for the idea, but, like most things, the reality would most likely get to me.

Every marriage is different. I don’t think it’s super uncommon. And I’ve talked with several people about it. He doesn’t want to share me romantically and I have no desire to involve myself with another person that way. 

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

There’s so many women our generation (I’m officially old having said this phrase now, at 35, assuming you’re around there too) who have discovered late in life and coming out that they are bi or pan after having married a man. My wife and a few others we know are all in this same boat. 
 

I can’t give much advice we can hardly get a weekend free cause of kids let alone anything else. 

[Keyser_Soze]

8 minutes ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

I do not have one. 

 

You can leave the boards again now.

[b_m_b_m_b_m]

1 minute ago, Keyser_Soze said:

 

You can leave the boards again now.

Don’t threaten me with a good time

[CastlevaniaNut18]

4 minutes ago, b_m_b_m_b_m said:

There’s so many women our generation (I’m officially old having said this phrase now, at 35, assuming you’re around there too) who have discovered late in life and coming out that they are bi or pan after having married a man. My wife and a few others we know are all in this same boat. 
 

I can’t give much advice we can hardly get a weekend free cause of kids let alone anything else. 

Yeah, 36 next month. It’s just nice hearing you aren’t the only one. Husband and I have had plenty of thoughtful discussions on it. Helps having a supportive partner. I just need to build up my self esteem. I’ve got a friend who’s totally down to take me out and be my wing woman whenever I’m ready. 

[Nokra]

Thought of another one:

 

They say they're especially into dive bars.  This about sums it up for me:

 

 

 

[Fizzzzle]

1 minute ago, Nokra said:

Thought of another one:

 

They say they're especially into dive bars.  This about sums it up for me:

 

 

 

I feel called out now.

[Kamusha]

On 6/30/2023 at 8:19 PM, CastlevaniaNut18 said:

I sort of know the feeling. I adore my husband and things are great between us, but if I were single, I’d probably be all over the women now. He’s left the door open for me to get some female experience if I want. I’m just socially awkward and don’t know how to approach that. 😩

 

If you haven't heard of it you should check out the app "Her". I normally are not into online dating but it's geared primarily for queer and bisexual women. It's been a real game changer for me as far as dating goes. It can be used for anything as serious or as casual as you want. Because there's no cis men on on the app it's pretty chill and not toxic lol.

[Nokra]

12 minutes ago, Kamusha said:

 

If you haven't heard of it you should check out the app "Her". I normally are not into online dating but it's geared primarily for queer and bisexual women. It's been a real game changer for me as far as dating goes. It can be used for anything as serious or as casual as you want. Because there's no cis men on on the app it's pretty chill and not toxic lol.

Hey, I resemble that remark! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Jason]

"I value God" immediately swipes left