Fizzzzle

Glad you got fozzie bear a new friend. What will you name them?

My brother got me a party game. My dad got me socks (I always need socks and he never believes me that that's what I want). My dad's girlfriend gave me $100, which I unfortunately gambled away the next day. I also got a beanie

Like a paper copy of your gpa?

You were born on New Year's Eve? That kind of sucks since you fall into the category of "I just bought you a Christmas present" (2 of my brothers have January birthdays and one of my sisters is December, they have the same problem) If you want, name a game on steam and I will gift it to you

I'm working a corporate event tonight and they want me to bring physical copies of my qualifications. I'm like... sure, for my employment ability, but like my liquor permit and my food handlers card? I can email them to you. It's 2023 (in a few hours). We are in a new age. I've got inspected for my liquor permit in 2020, they just whip out a tablet and put in your license number, they don't like physically inspect your "card," which is something you literally just print from a printer, it's not like it's from special paper that can't be faked.

This was back when they literally wrote songs about fucking 14 year olds and people are shocked that they, like... fucked 14 year olds.

If you just graduate from college you'll get a great job. I entered college in 2007, all of the sudden it was like "well we didn't mean, like, *those* degrees."

Over the last few years, I've developed the idea of wanting to do a cross country trip where I visit all the I towns my ancestors are buried in. Whole lot of those dipshits are in central/Western Pennsylvania. It's not that I have any particularly affinity for them, it's more of a way to get me to go to random towns I would otherwise never visit. Like why would I ever go to Rostraver, PA. I wouldn't, but I do have a solid few dozen or so people buried there who contributed to my DNA.

He's one of those guys that was already so mythological that it is hard for my brain to accept that he was still alive.

Oh, absolutely. If someone legitimately messed up your order, say something. They will (or should) fix it. Just don't be a dick about it. One time I was bartending and these two ladies were ordering passionfruit martinis that got a sugar rim. They ordered 3 rounds before I realized my salt and sugar had been mixed up, so I had been giving them salt rims the whole time without realising it. That's one of those times where they could have just been like "... This is salt" and I would have rectified my mistake.. Another time, I was really busy and charged someone for a more expensive drink than what they got without realising it. Totally my fault and their bill ended up being like $20 more than it should have been. Rather than just, y'know... tell me and let me fix it, they paid the bill, didn't tip, and left a note for my manager. It ended up being a whole thing.

You right, I meant sushi specifically, I was mixing my regulations up

Surprised he didn't land suspiciously on two bullets that were laying on the ground right where the back of his head hit the pavement.

I used to work at this restaurant where we had these 2 guys that would come in probably twice a week. They complained about *something* almost every single time. Their burger wasn't cooked right, their iced tea wasn't strong enough (they didn't drink), their fries weren't crispy enough, it was too cold in the restaurant, it was too hot in the restaurant (we only had a wood furnace for heat), etc Eventually after like three years of serving these mooks I finally asked them "honestly, why do you guys keep coming in here, since you clearly hate it?" Thermally l ultimately they just liked how special they felt by having a manager bend over backwards for them, eventually I was like just fucking go somewhere else, you're disrupting my business.

I can't wait to be far enough away from my family again that I simply don't have to go!

Yeah, if you grind your own meat you can pretty much mainline that shit. It's only the ground stuff from grocery that's potentially harmful. That being said, I suppose there's always the risk of mad cow disease, but I'm pretty sure you can't cook that out, anyway. #weprobablyshouldnteatcows

Raw beef can be totally safe. That's why beef tartar is a thing. That's why dry aging steak is safe - bacteria only covers the surface, it doesn't penetrate into the meat. Salmonella, on the other hand, does actually penetrate the meat. That's why raw poultry is always unsafe. Also why any seafood you've ever had in a developed country is never "fresh caught." USDA requires that all fish served to customers be frozen at some point, so it kind of doesn't make a difference whether you're getting sushi in Seattle or Columbus - as long as it's sourced right, it's all frozen anyway.

To me, nothing beats Mario games from a sheer gameplay perspective. It never gets boring, it's easy to understand but hard to master, you can binge it or just play in bite-sized chunks, they're all fucking great. Also Stardew Valley. Also The Sims. I wish another company would take a crack at doing something like The Sims, because EA is the only one doing it and it's been a buggy mess for a decade.

Feeling pressured to give people gifts makes me not want to do it.

Once, when I was in a vegan phase, I ordered a vegan banh mi and they gave me one with meat in it. I was with my girlfriend at the time, and she insisted on sending it back and getting a new one. I was like... I'd rather not waste food, I'll just eat this one, it's not like I don't like it. She insisted. It was kind of embarrassing. There was one other time where I ordered chicken wings at a bar that were straight up raw. I'm assuming this place did a par-fry on their wings, like you normally do on french fries for extra crispiness. The problem is you can't very well tell the difference on the outside between a chicken wing that has been par fried and one that has been actually cooked, so there was a mix up somewhere. Like someone left the wings in the basket without dropping them in the fryer, then someone else saw them and assumed they'd already been cooked.

One of the things that's starting to annoy me is the amount of times where a quest will bug out OR I'm supposed to be waiting for something to happen, OR I haven't finished the quest yet but I wasn't aware I'm supposed to do anything else. But I have no idea which of those things is true, so I end up having to look it up. This kind of thing happens most often with the world events.

I wish there were other message boards still active that weren't so exclusive to one niche or weren't complete poison. There's something about the sweet spot of feeling like I know something about the people posting (contextualization), but it's still a degree removed from something like a facebook feed. At the same time, while Discord servers are more personal in some way, it always feels like joining into a conversation late. You know when you meet up with friends at a bar and when you sit down you realize they are deep into a discussion about something that you can't understand without context? That's what discord is like all the time. With message boards, it's like you can wind back time to see where the conversation started.

I've been playing this game recently. I'm about 50ish hours in. It's nowhere near on the same level as Odyssey or Origins, but it's been enjoyable. There are parts that are starting to feel like a chore, whereas Odyssey never did - in fact, I played it all the way through twice. There is no chance in hell I'm playing through Valhalla again. The story has good parts, but Eivor has nowhere near the charisma as Bayek/Kassandra and it's starting to feel a little boring. The DLC is all pretty bad so far in my experience, though I haven't done all of it. Ireland ends up feelig like radial fetch quests that unlock bits of story every once in a while, the rogue-like stuff is awful, the Asgard stuff is boring. I haven't played the raid on Paris yet, I'm hoping that one is good. So far, I'd give the game a solid 75-80. I'm having fun, though there are things that are starting to grate on me and my enthusiasm is starting to wane. I doubt I will finish the Ireland DLC, maybe not the Asgard DLC, and I'll give the Paris stuff a whack, but I'm not expecting much.

The same song that's perfect for every single holiday: Cheeseburger in Paradise

I think it was around this time last year that I said I was dropping everything and moving to New Orleans. Well, I did. I got rid of almost everything I own and moved. What I don't know that I've shared completely is that I'm not in New Orleans anymore. New Orleans is... a great place to visit, let's leave it at that. Living there kind of sucked, at least for me. However, in July I got a job opportunity in Alaska doing some seasonal work at a resort, so I abandoned my job at a gay night club in New Orleans and packed it up again. It really isn't a big deal when everything you own can fit into 2 bags. So I did that for a few months, made a decent chunk of cash, then I went back to Portland for about a month, where I stayed with my dad. Then I went to San Jose, intending for that to just be a vacation for a few days, but ended up doing work for this event space and stayed for a while. Then I had another job opportunity open up back home, so I did that, managing catering events. I found a place to live that's month to month, so I can leave again whenever I want. A couple weeks ago I fell off a ladder while hanging up Christmas lights and fucked my knee up, but thankfully no lasting damage was done. Now, going into 2023, I have no idea what I want to do, but suddenly it feels like anything is possible. I'm not tied to anything. I barely own anything. All it would take is to find a decent paying job that I could do remotely and suddenly the whole world feels like my oyster (I don't understand that saying). So, yeah... That's where my life is at. I have no idea what I'm going to do next, and over the last couple years I've experienced everything from being broke and homeless to not being broke and still kind of like 2 steps away from being homeless, but I wouldn't have it any other way. There's something freeing about being one text away from going to work in fucking like South Carolina or wherever. If I can lock down a long term remote job that isn't just temporary, I think I'll go back to Thailand for a while. I miss it there. I don't know whether 2023 will be fruitful, but not knowing is half the fun at this point. Also fuck @Biggie for whatever he's about to say in response.

JEWISH space lasers, specifically. She doesn't get to duck being anti-Semitic just because Kanye had to make everyone remember why they gaslight anti-Semitism instead of saying it outright.