You've Reached a Mental Health Checkpoint; Rest Beside the Fire, Adventurer

[TheShader]

I've noticed there's been a lot of mention of people's mental health recently, and a lot of us seem to be struggling in that department. I, myself, had a level 9 panic attack early this last week(And not 20 feet from the Washington Post's political team, it was fun!). So I wanted to take a moment just to let everyone here know that your struggles are real, your mental health is real, and I hope you feel comfortable speaking openly to someone. Be that in this thread, privately to me, or with someone else close to you that you trust. No one has to, nor should, suffer in silence.

 

When things feel rough, remember to breathe. In through the nose, out through the mouth. It's the simplest thing you can do to help center yourself back to reality. Hang in there, and remember to get your own oxygen mask on first before you help someone else with theirs. Ya'll are solid 10/10s, and I want to see you take care of yourselves, and to remember that you don't have to go through it alone 💜.

 

Just take things one step at a time, and eventually you'll be looking back on how far you've come rather than how much further there is to go.

 

RESOURCES

 

• Suicide Lifeline - 988 (Can also be texted)
• Suicide Lifeline Website - https://www.988lifeline.org
• Domestic Abuse Lifeline - 800-799-7233
• Transgender Lifeline - (US)877-565-8860 (Can)877-330-6366
• Psychology Today Local Therapy finder - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists
• Free Online Therapy - https://www.7cups.com https://etherapypro.com 
• Paid Online Therapy - https://www.betterhelp.com 
• Paid Online LGBTQ Therapy - https://www.pridecounseling.com 

 

USERS WITH OPEN DMS

 

• TheShader
• Zaku3
• GoldenTongue

[Fizzzzle]

I'm an 8/10 on a good day, but I appreciate the sentiment.

 

Not to turn this into a "bUt Me" thing, but I have had the exceptionally good fortune to basically take the last 2 months off if work minus the odd project here and there and sheeeeit, my mental health is better than it's been in a long time.

 

I wish that was something our corporate overlords realized. When I'm restful and alert, I tackle every day like it owes me money. When every day feels like a pointless grind, endlessly going down a tunnel where the point of light at the end never gets bigger, I just want to shoot myself and every task I do is like trying to give a cat a bath.

[TheShader]

11 minutes ago, Fizzzzle said:

 I have had the exceptionally good fortune to basically take the last 2 months off if work minus the odd project here and there and sheeeeit, my mental health is better than it's been in a long time.

Oh, most definitely. My mental health was never worse than when I worked 24/7 with zero breaks. These days I do a combination of seasonal work as well as freelance work, which often allows me to have months at a time where I'm either not working or I'm working at a much more relaxed pace.

 

Admittedly it sometimes leads to where I'm at right now, in which I should be coasting fine but am struggling because someone from last year refuses to pay me the like 3-4k they owed me for services rendered that they owe me. Which I'll end up having to sue for if I ever want to see, but in the meantime I'm playing a 'fun' game of catchup.

[Fizzzzle]

58 minutes ago, TheShader said:

Oh, most definitely. My mental health was never worse than when I worked 24/7 with zero breaks. These days I do a combination of seasonal work as well as freelance work, which often allows me to have months at a time where I'm either not working or I'm working at a much more relaxed pace.

 

Admittedly it sometimes leads to where I'm at right now, in which I should be coasting fine but am struggling because someone from last year refuses to pay me the like 3-4k they owed me for services rendered that they owe me. Which I'll end up having to sue for if I ever want to see, but in the meantime I'm playing a 'fun' game of catchup.

I had someone not pay me during Jan/Feb of last year. They later declared bankruptcy. They had the balls to send me a W-2 (I move a lot, so he had to text me to get my address)

 

I thought he was finally sending my my paycheck. Instead I was like "you want me to file taxes on money I never got?!"

[unogueen]

19 minutes ago, Fizzzzle said:

I had someone not pay me during Jan/Feb of last year. They later declared bankruptcy. They had the balls to send me a W-2 (I move a lot, so he had to text me to get my address)

 

I thought he was finally sending my my paycheck. Instead I was like "you want me to file taxes on money I never got?!"

There's a reciprocal side right? If you're expected to file for money you never got, they have to file your income as being paid. Maybe worth a lawyer?

[CastlevaniaNut18]

Mine has improved since switching jobs from med-surg to psych(ironically). 
 

Should have done it ages ago. 

[Guest]

40 minutes ago, unogueen said:

Maybe worth a lawyer?

 

You don't start with a lawyer, just a complaint to whatever state labor board there is. Like here in Texas, you would file a wage claim with the Texas Workforce Commission. They do the initial investigation and will demand the funds on your behalf.

[unogueen]

3 minutes ago, sblfilms said:

 

You don't start with a lawyer, just a complaint to whatever state labor board there is. Like here in Texas, you would file a wage claim with the Texas Workforce Commission. They do the initial investigation and will demand the funds on your behalf.

Cool. It's hard for me to remember sometimes you guys have some form of government.

[Guest]

Mental health matters. My wife and daughter both have strong anxiety issues, and my wife has dealt with suicidal ideation in the past. Fortunately both are doing well at present   

[unogueen]

As for the mental health thing. People really need to have some meditative time to gather goings on at any point. If this means having a sit down at work or just collecting yourself at any point. The modern world is married to a concept of optimization that really favour no one but the class just above you. Learn to work slow and lead personal expectations, rather than cater to invisible whims.

[Fizzzzle]

5 minutes ago, sblfilms said:

Mental health matters. My wife and daughter both have strong anxiety issues, and my wife has dealt with suicidal ideation in the past. Fortunately both are doing well at present   

Mental health should always come first. I hit a breaking point in late 2021 where I had basically a full psychotic break after months of insomnia. After that I was like "never again." No job is worth sacrificing my mental health.

[Fizzzzle]

56 minutes ago, unogueen said:

There's a reciprocal side right? If you're expected to file for money you never got, they have to file your income as being paid. Maybe worth a lawyer?

I'm not about to fight someone over a thousand bucks in a different state.

 

Of course, they're probably banking on that, which is why they never paid me. Only they're claiming they did pay me, probably for their own tax reasons.

[Remarkableriots]

I'm not sure if it was a panic attack but sometimes I'll have issues with sounds becoming unbearable. I had a horrible day where it felt like drowning and had a lot of stress happening.

[TheShader]

20 minutes ago, Remarkableriots said:

I'm not sure if it was a panic attack but sometimes I'll have issues with sounds becoming unbearable. I had a horrible day where it felt like drowning and had a lot of stress happening.

Can definitely be a panic attack, if not anxiety related in general. As my panic attack was slowly building I lost my ability to filter out extra noise, and the room full of 100 chatting people all sounded like they were directly in my head shouting at me. Panic attacks can also range from small to huge. Sometimes it can be something small and affect you for a couple of minutes, others can be like mine where I ended up on the floor unable to breathe or get up.

[silentbob]

I use to be great with anxiety and sleep with ease. I’m lucky if I can get 5 straight hours or sleep or in total. I know my last full time job with Pepsi was the start of my anxiety, and being let go kinda gave me a breather but then that financial anxiety started. Before I got that job I also did very little driving out of the city. Next thing I knew I was driving in downtown Toronto and beyond for work. Then my wrist injury happened and fucked me from really seeking a true high paying job again. I’ve mentioned my Covid long hauler shit, also hasn’t been helping me either. I’ve been in and out of jobs (mostly out) until this past August. It’s work, not greatest pay but my anxiety isn’t as bad, but still there. Pretty sure I had depression and still battle it (but pressure isn’t as bad right now) Plus knowing my past dog Buddy(the 2nd) was dying on me slowly didn’t help, but glad I was off for his last few weeks.
 

I’m real worried for my younger sister, well she’s 38. We work at the same store but different departments/managers. She lost her manager for 6 months to stay home with his new born. Replacement manager they hired was a worthless piece of shit that literally did nothing, hid in the office for hours without helping her, or would fuck off and hide in other departments. He was in his late 50’s or 60’s and was nothing but a con man really. She ran the department but doesn’t want the responsibility (it’s stressful) Her manager just came off maternity leave and just told her yesterday that he is leaving for good in March. So she’s back to square one and she’s shutting herself down. 
 

I know what has helped me are my walks with my dog Fozzie (Buddy soon to follow) Having Buddy and his puppy energy is intoxicating at times. Plus for my walks I put on some of my music and have a couple tokes of my weed to put me in a good place. I don’t drink and my weed has been my escape which I know at times I might overdo but it makes me happy. Plus when my warm weather is back, golf can commence again. Only went twice last year but I’m hoping to increase that for this year.

 

so for anyone in a rough spot right now. TRY TO STAY STRONG and don’t shut people out who wanna truly help you. 

[TheShader]

20 minutes ago, silentbob said:

I know what has helped me are my walks with my dog Fozzie (Buddy soon to follow) Having Buddy and his puppy energy is intoxicating at times. Plus for my walks I put on some of my music and have a couple tokes of my weed to put me in a good place.

This sounds like a great way to get away from the world for a bit and center yourself 💜.

[Guest]

15 minutes ago, Fizzzzle said:

Only they're claiming they did pay me, probably for their own tax reasons.

 

Withholding payroll taxes and not paying the IRS those funds is WAAAAAAY more legally serious than stiffing a person on wages, that's why they filed like they actually paid you even though they didn't! My Dad did that on accident for years back before there were payroll services like ADP, because he didn't understand the old school paper withholding tables from the IRS. The penalties were severe. Took me over a decade to fix all his IRS problems.

[TheShader]

Edited the original post to include resources. Please let me know if there are any good resources I missed. Keep in mind I tried to keep the resources concise. For example, I know there are a million online therapy spaces, but I tried to keep it concise so as to not give people in need of quick help/services having to dig through a 50-foot list of resources.

[Zaku3]

13 hours ago, TheShader said:

Edited the original post to include resources. Please let me know if there are any good resources I missed. Keep in mind I tried to keep the resources concise. For example, I know there are a million online therapy spaces, but I tried to keep it concise so as to not give people in need of quick help/services having to dig through a 50-foot list of resources.

 

Add me. I feel like I may have contributed to this. I am trying to develop a Ph.D level understanding of psychology cuz it's super useful knowledge and I should be able to teach it to someone else. Recognize when I don't know something and refer you to a professional and recognize if you need medicine to heal yourself. (Difficulties thinking if you can't think about an emotional situation calmly and rationally and make progress on it you probably need medicine cuz I did)

[TheShader]

12 minutes ago, Zaku3 said:

 

Add me. I feel like I may have contributed to this. I am trying to develop a Ph.D level understanding of psychology cuz it's super useful knowledge and I should be able to teach it to someone else. Recognize when I don't know something and refer you to a professional and recognize if you need medicine to heal yourself. (Difficulties thinking if you can't think about an emotional situation calmly and rationally and make progress on it you probably need medicine cuz I did)

Added a section of users that have offered open DMs!

[Mr.Vic20]

My job sees me absolutely submerged in stress with few opportunities to catch a break. My current solution: running in the dark! I slip out of bed at 4:00am and hit the road in total darkness with my music cranked in my ears. I'm bundled up as its typically around 20F out most mornings. Its like a deprivation tank, but with Pink Floyd 7 & Tom Petty to keep me company!  

[TheShader]

9 minutes ago, Mr.Vic20 said:

My job sees me absolutely submerged in stress with few opportunities to catch a break. My current solution: running in the dark! I slip out of bed at 4:00am and hit the road in total darkness with my music cranked in my ears. I'm bundled up as its typically around 20F out most mornings. Its like a deprivation tank, but with Pink Floyd 7 & Tom Petty to keep me company!  

This is my favorite stuff. I'm always sad when I live somewhere that's not really safe to be roaming around at 3-4am with headphones in. It feels like you just have the world to yourself, for me.

[Zaku3]

Yes the simple act of going for a walk is too good. Crap I need to walk my dogs. Ok next time its in the 50s again with little to no wind. 

 

Been thinking nonstop about my ex-wife. Gotta see if I learned enough for dat Ph.D. 

 

Omg choose a good therapist. I'd litterwlly be one right now if the one I had in High School didn't make a bad judgement based call.

[GoldenTongue]

I've struggled with my mental health at various points in the past, and while I'm able to manage it fairly well at present, I still find myself exploring new forms of self-care at times.

Journaling may be the single most productive practice I learned to embrace.  By nature, I try to be very deliberate and clear when writing, and that effortful thinking was/is very helpful when trying to write out how I am feeling.  Forcing myself to really channel my feelings into something that reads (to me) coherently led me to also consider questions of why/how, along with exploring if a surge in feelings after XXX happened was really because of XXX, or because of something(s) else that I'd repressed until it boiled over.

 

I spent a large part of my life repressing my own feelings, which meant that until a few years ago, I was rather hopelessly inept when it came to dealing with many types of personal issues in a healthy and productive way.  Overcoming the fear of dealing with those feelings, of learning how to understand them, and learning how to process them, has taken A LOT of work, and if I'm honest, remains a work in progress.  But while that journey does continue, I'm immensely thankful for how I've grown, and for the help I've gotten; it's helped me accept the fact that asking for help is okay, that not having all the answers is okay, and that struggling to understand the questions (let alone the answers) is also okay.

 

Feel free to add my name to the list of open DM's.  My own compulsivities have prompted me to study certain aspects of mental health pretty extensively, adn while I am far from any sort of professional, I'm happy to share what I have learned in the context of how I've been able to apply it to my own experiences.

[Zaku3]

@Brian You don't need to be Carl Jung. You just have to be smart enough to use the knowledge he has given us and teach someone else how to live.

 

Omg I'm gonna write a psychology book explaining how capitalism needs you smart enough to do the work but not so smart you start a revolution. This thought also leads to the question of what would a bloodless socialist revolution look like.(Highly unlike on first glance don't get your hopes up. I just think the idea is interesting enough to me to warrant further study.)

[TheShader]

So earlier discussion in here motivated me last night to file a labor complaint with California for the ~$5k I'm owed in stolen wages. It took a lot because anxiety usually overcomes me, worried I won't be believed over these things. 

 

Anxiety still be hitting hard, but I'm glad I did it. We'll see where things go from here. 

[Guest]

17 minutes ago, TheShader said:

So earlier discussion in here motivated me last night to file a labor complaint with California for the ~$5k I'm owed in stolen wages. It took a lot because anxiety usually overcomes me, worried I won't be believed over these things. 

 

Anxiety still be hitting hard, but I'm glad I did it. We'll see where things go from here. 

Try and compile as much documentation as you can. If you have stuff like time sheets, pay stubs showing your hourly rate, bank account statements showing the relevant periods where you weren’t paid, and any correspondence (texts, emails, etc) showing you asking about the unpaid wages.

 

Good luck!

[Zaku3]

 

7 hours ago, TheShader said:

So earlier discussion in here motivated me last night to file a labor complaint with California for the ~$5k I'm owed in stolen wages. It took a lot because anxiety usually overcomes me, worried I won't be believed over these things. 

 

Anxiety still be hitting hard, but I'm glad I did it. We'll see where things go from here. 

 

The counter to anxiety is confidence. I'm a genius not because I am I am but realizing I can't fix myself by myself is a genius act.

 

Also maybe we need a disclaimer in the event someone finds them self with a gun at their temple hit me up first. Cuz I' typing this only because killing myself was never that easy. If it was I would have done it. (No access to firearms and I didn't know about suicide by cop until a time when I was good enough to not try that)

 

Btw I might need to wait for therapy for this answer but Imma ask. Is a learning disability something that is treated by medicine? Depression took alot of things away from me including my ex-wife but I couldn't save the relationship and its not my fault because I could never think straight about emotionally charged situations and I can't attribute that change to therapy at all. The meds i take are too effective.

 

Btw am I crazy because I only noticed these changes cuz giving my ex-wife an AAR of the past decade? Am I crazy for being madly in love with her again because I sense she is the person at her core that I met in 2008? Am I crazy because she made me realized how far I've come by providing her an AAR and I love her even more because she's shown me how far I've come and still inspires me to be a better person so I can be with her? Asking cuz I'm being told I am by others and I don't feel that is the case and my therapist would have said something. She is suprisngly supportive of me speaking to a person I have what we determined was a toxic relationship with. Also my point of reference for toxic relationships is my father and I don't get stay the fuck out of my life vibes from her I get "Welcome Stay awhile and listen" vibes.

 

Btw the thread title is based and red pilled. (I'm dying on this hill to take red pilled back from the right. You can't call yourself based and red pilled if you don't actually fit the definition. That's having taken the blue pill.)

[darkness35]

Honestly with all the shit I've been dealing I'm surprised I'm rather alive, although in a chronic survival state that shouldn't even be regarded as healthy.  With work being that one big stress and having the burden of helping them as much as possible (being that breakthrough success for families involved within the CPS for many years), having to deal with so much friendship drama/stress, and identity issues, I'm not even sure where or at what spectrum I am currently in right now.  I'm alive, yet dead, yet apathetic, yet empathetic.

[Zaku3]

7 minutes ago, darkness35 said:

Honestly with all the shit I've been dealing I'm surprised I'm rather alive, although in a chronic survival state that shouldn't even be regarded as healthy.  With work being that one big stress and having the burden of helping them as much as possible (being that breakthrough success for families involved within the CPS for many years), having to deal with so much friendship drama/stress, and identity issues, I'm not even sure where or at what spectrum I am currently in right now.  I'm alive, yet dead, yet apathetic, yet empathetic.

 

Answer.

 

 

A not joke answer. You are me when I turned 18. I was fine I thought I was cured of depression because I didn't want to not exist I was okayish. You still need help to get better possibly meds depending on your individual circumstances. Like thinking about it my depression was caused by not being able to correctly process things. The meds changed how my brain works and the therapist walked me through changing myself because the meds let me do that. 

 

I'm still alive as I said because suicide wasn't as easy for me since my mother and no one in my immediate family owns a gun. It was never as easy as putting a loaded gun to the side of my head and the closest I got to it to that was a shooting range where I learned to respect firearms because it's litterally so easy to kill someone with one. I think that cemented my view violence as a last resort and only lethal violence if I can't unlethally take someone down. 

 

If you need more knowledge and wisdom just ask.

 

If it makes u feel better I want to leave Verizon because I'm flexible enough to understand what being an anti-capitalist truly means but I can't do that by myself its a collective effort. I can start it by expressing myself to other individuals but I am still one man regardless of how briliant I shine so there are limits to what I can do. But I can't in good conciousness make capitalist richer by protecting them from their customers. I can't wake up anymore and justify enforcing undefendable actions like charging struggling people a 50 dollar reconnection fee everytime they get disconnected. I have cried at work more times then I care to because someone who I have no beef with has 100+ dollars in restoral fees and they obviously can't pay them and I can't justify a good enough reason that covers my ass to give them the credit. 

 

Shyt my mom just got a 5k check from her pension and I get some of that money when she dies. I can hold out for something that might not make me cry. I'm articulate enough and not sappy but my relationship with my ex-wife is a telenovela and I should write a book on it and hopefully enough people will read it someone makes a telenovela out of it and I can no longer have to screw people over directly becuae I want to live my life by treating other in an altrjistic manner. 

 

I'd drop my mic but there is more stuff to say.

[Zaku3]

Pls respond darkness. I need your reaction to be even madder at my HS therapist for telling me not to be a therapist. I can't even call him trash tier cuz I didn't put effort into therapy back then as a depressed teenager.

[darkness35]

[Zaku3]

13 minutes ago, darkness35 said:

 

I am one with the universe. He didnt say that to be mean he was saying that based on observing a depressed teen not showing improvement and pristiq was invented after High School and zoloft flat out didn't help. Ok i feel better now.

 

For future reference this id what you need to be able to do to forgive someone enough it doesn't bother you.

[Zaku3]

Btw this goes for everyone that reads or is reading this thread. Critique my posts because I can't be a therapist cuz of the libtards (i assure you im not going down the alt-right) so a decent alternative is video game streaming with a chat not only discussing the game I'm playing but providing psychology based advice is gonna help people more and they will be likely to donate to me thus a great way to make a living. I think. I just stream what I'm doing minus reading, eating, personal stuff. 

 

Lol personal stuff might not be a terrible idea I could use to lose alot kf pounds and if hot chicks can use onlyfans then a handsome man might be able to? (Im joking unless I can get subs)

 

Oo btw focus on your actual dreams, jokes, and anything else that might be a Fruedian slip. If you can't explain to me or yourself who you are or have trouble doing that the answers might be in your dreams or in your jokes. I am trying so hard with my old wife cuz I hate being wrong and my future happiness is on the line as well so it's worth it to me to exhaust all possibilities. I decided to do it because a mutal friend tried to talk me in to speaking with her and I dreamed about her once before she reached out and she loved me. Those dreams have been rare since I realized she doesn't. So I figured I'm a psychic or my id thinks im ready to try again. Psychic if I experience deja vu and I can trace it to that dream. Just my id feeling I'm ready if I find a resolution. (Even if its i just knoe i should never talk to her again cuz it can't work) Early experiments show me to be right my skills of reasoning are on point. I'm a House MD that doesn't hate himself. Any and all opinions are welcome because I can't stand by what I feel or think if I can't prove I should feel or think that to myself.

[darkness35]

You're trying to preach to a choir that's filled with only your ego, and assuming that your own experiences can mold onto others.  No offense, but I stopped reading when you said "you're me when I turned 18."