DuesEXgame

I’ve been absolutely dying to share stuff with people, so this thread is a dream, and I’m just gonna not hold back…

My favorite band in the universe, The Pillows, and a few of my absolute faves of theirs…

Then I was remembering some old faves, L’arc En Ciel -

Asian Kung Fu Generation

And just so no one thinks I only like Japanese music for some stupid reason, here is Screaming Females, Amanda Palmer, Swan Lake, Oddisee, Modest Mouse, and one more and I’m done for now lol.

10 minutes ago, Nokra said:

This post made me have to look up "dabbing" to learn what it is ("the consumption of cannabis by inhaling the vapor of heated cannabis extract oil") and what it isn't (injecting heroin into your eyeballs)  TIL.

 

Anyway, glad you seem to have a good path forward! 

 

 

It’s magical, and the way I’ve come to think of heating the glass bowl is to just patiently summon Calcifer from Howl’s Moving Castle…By stoking the bottom of the glass with the blue flame from the torch until you start to see red flame building, and you kind of just entice him to come out until he is dancing around the bottom of the glass, and then you stop. Calcifer did his job and then you take a tiny pinch of the various waxes and oils and crystal things, apply to the heated glass, there’s a tiny glass bulb-tube thing to really regulate air flow and you make magic happen immediately. And they all have different flavors and effects, it’s like a dream…

20 minutes ago, Keyser_Soze said:

Glad I could be useful for once in my life. Good luck sir. Make some masterpieces 🙏

You were more than useful, you saved the day. I’ll never forget it, friend, thank you.

1 hour ago, best3444 said:

Listen to the others in here. I didn't realize everything you've been through. I'm not healthy mentally so me giving advice is comical. 

Nah, man, you’re fine. Thank you all for listening, the urgency of this post was because my defensive response spiked through the roof but I think I just settled things.

It was Keyser-Soze’s idea about making Norma an emotional support animal that saved me I think. Once the old witch realized she wouldn’t be able to threaten to separate me from Norma, it was over, she sat there pitifully defeated. And now I feel like I can settle.

Settled enough now to start using these amazing art supplies now and see what I can do…

Also, ask me about my magical new dabbing option that is so simple and efficient, it’s a key back to that other reality I miss so much, and I’m already a master at using it.

37 minutes ago, Keyser_Soze said:

I'm not an expert and I only looked into this briefly but is it possible to get Norma classified as an emotional support animal or assistance animal for yourself?

 

I think if you could do this it would make it more difficult to separate you two.

 

Per the

 

Sounds like you need a prescription from a mental health professional to sign off on it, perhaps something to look into.

I haven’t looked into anything but I have a medical card and it’s the best shit ever and 2 decades ago it would’ve saved my life.

So, problem?

Oh thank Christ, the same page! Lol

I am actually totally fine and happy at the moment in my room which I turned into an art studio, and me and Norma are having the best time. And the plan was exactly to just set up my account on Monday cause I have 0 access right now to MY money…

But that’s not the real plan, I probed further and she is planning to take legal action, again, on Monday till I agree to be back on medication, so, she’s threatening to separate me from Norma, again…

And I swear to you, at this point, God help any useless piece of heartless garbage that would try to take me away from this cat again. I won’t accept it, she needs me, and I’ll defend her with my fucking life.

7 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

I honestly cannot claim to understand what you're experiencing at all,

 

The only recourse I can possibly think of is to get in touch with social services or an attorney to see if there's some type of legal recourse.

 

 

Yes, that is the starting point I don’t want to be at and I’m saying I have no idea how to even proceed, and if all anyone is telling me is to do it on my own how is that help?? I am asking for help!

1 hour ago, DuesEXgame said:

ok now I can clarify. The last decade. Doctors, therapists, locked in psych wards, every med they could think of, electro shock fucking therapy, none of it helped and it all crippled and nearly destroyed me. But I have sorted through my own issues in my own mind and the point is I feel happier than EVER before!

 

I lost over 50 pounds, I’ve been exercising again, I quit cigarettes for good!

 

Me and Norma are doing amazing, finally…

 

and this vile cunt is threatening once again, with no legal leg to stand on, to take action again cause she wants me to take more meds till my defiant attitude is killed, like always, always, always…

 

That’s what I was asking for help with…how do I defend against this shit this time?

I’m really feeling discouraged…You guys all claimed to understand me and these responses show that you doubt my word and are assuming I am acting crazy and maybe more meds are the answer and you’re breaking my fucking heart.

2 hours ago, best3444 said:

@DuesEXgame Have you ever tried medication? (I apologize if i missed that you did before). I'm on 4 major types and yes, there are issues with meds as most of the people here know I struggle with but the positives completely out weigh the negatives.

 

Your last post comes off as though you truly need professional help and I've been in your situation. I had to climb out of SEVERE depression and reach out for help. It may actually be better to be in an intensive out patient program than living in your current situation.

 

I understand you absolutely love your cat but it's essential you take care of your mental health. I feel really sad and feel your pain when I read your posts but please get some help. 

ok now I can clarify. The last decade. Doctors, therapists, locked in psych wards, every med they could think of, electro shock fucking therapy, none of it helped and it all crippled and nearly destroyed me. But I have sorted through my own issues in my own mind and the point is I feel happier than EVER before!

I lost over 50 pounds, I’ve been exercising again, I quit cigarettes for good!

Me and Norma are doing amazing, finally…

and this vile cunt is threatening once again, with no legal leg to stand on, to take action again cause she wants me to take more meds till my defiant attitude is killed, like always, always, always…

That’s what I was asking for help with…how do I defend against this shit this time?

1 minute ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

@DuesEXgame - I honestky don't know what to say other than you do need help.  You need to be under medical care, for both you and Norma.

What kind of medical care?? There is nothing wrong with either of us! I just got her to the point where she is happy and purring and coming outside with me, and I’m healthier than I’ve ever, ever been, but for being under the heel of this nightmare woman…

That’s the solution you’re offering me?…

I’ve been recording conversations and telling everyone and just posted this on fb and no one will help, so maybe better luck here, but I doubt it.

I’m really not ok, I’m in pain and afraid…

The hideous person I’m for some reason chained to, who keeps insisting she’s my mother has left me to sit with another threat.

We agreed the plan was she would set me up with my own bank account and let me use my own money that I received for literally not being able to work for a decade, free from her supervision and needing her permission, as if that is something crazy for a 37 year old man to ask for? And she would leave me alone…

But probe just a little more and her real plan was to try and take legal action again and force me back into a psych ward so they can force feed me more meds to suppress my bad attitude.

But, it’s Norma. She is so happy and peaceful at the moment, and I had to nurse her back to this after being locked up away from her for a week…

And now she’s threatening to try and do this again and hurt Norma and I’m feeling defeated. My body can’t take this, it’s on insanely high alert. And it hurts so much…

Maybe I’ll try one more time to explain to everyone that this cat means more than the world to me. And people start to aww or roll their eyes and fuck you heartless monsters forever.

She is not even “my” cat. She’s a beautiful creature who ended up living in my room, my dungeon, when I was in the pits, hating everything, wondering why no one was ever there for me, praying every time I went to sleep to just not wake up again to more pain…

And she would come snuggle with me and eventually start purring, she was abused and abandoned to, and it was like she was saying you’re the only one who has been nice to me, and I trust you. And that’s how it started 10 years ago, and it grew beyond words.

When she leaves the world, I don’t know how my heart will even continue to beat. 

And once again I face the threat of being separated from her and how am I to react, and why won’t anyone help me, I obviously can’t fucking solve this one, and I NEED HELP PLEASE.

20 minutes ago, best3444 said:

 

The money situation sounds separate from your living arrangement, correct? I'm on your side btw. 

I know dude, I have a million options, and she can’t do anything…I’m just trying to settle this so I can be alone in my room with Norma and I don’t have to look at her stupid, ugly face.

Which, here I am in my room anyway, exploring my magical new dab options, and how does she think she’ll stop me? It’s a complete joke but still, the stubbornness to surrender power is pure insanity…

23 minutes ago, best3444 said:

 

Unfortunately it's her house her rules. I'm currently living with my parents because I had a complete financial disaster almost a year ago. I have amazing parents but they set boundaries for sure. Obviously an open flame like you're explaining is completely harmless but you have no control in your situation. I'm sorry to hear how much your mom sucks. 

Why is it her house her rules? I’m only here at all cause I was unable to work for a decade trying to sort through crippling mental health issues…so eventually I started receiving a small amount of assistance, and that’s supposed to be my money but I still need her permission to access it?

this is endless bullshit.

Ok. I really need help. She just made it clear that I can’t even do my own thing in my own little room which is all I asked for, but she won’t let me have an open flame in my room…

Which is an absolute joke cause I’m using this safe new torch thing just to heat a tiny piece of glass cause I’m using dab wax now cause it’s so much more efficient.

but she keeps coming back to not allowing me to do that in my room safely and comfortably, cause gee golly I might start a fire in HER house and god fucking dammit. I’ve never hated anyone so much in my life…how can I press charges or something? Seriously, at this point…

6 hours ago, Greatoneshere said:

 

The average person is uninteresting, boring and an underachiever contributing to the overpopulation problem. They're in unhappy marriages trying to make everyone who doesn't have kids have kids so everyone is as miserable as them. It's hard but fuck them. But yeah, most people are shitty. But most of the peeps here, they actually care or try to.  Glad you're back.

I just made a new post in the post your pic thread to get people caught up on me. I’m so glad I’m back…

Had trouble figuring out how to share images but I got it now, so, here’s me, Norma Jean, my new smoke goodies, and on the tv, FLCL: Shoegaze, which not only took the place of being my favorite anime of all time, it was my favorite piece of media of any kind, ever, and the last one I really need to see, cause now I just wanna create my own art…That’s how good it was.

Ask me more, I have been dying to tell someone about this and could talk about it for days, months, years, decades, eons…

4 minutes ago, Greatoneshere said:

 

Yeah, this unfortunately happens a lot. My two younger brothers credit me a lot with "saving" them from our parents. I hate taking credit because they did a lot themselves but it's important for the oldest sibling to protect and take care of their younger siblings. That's their fucking job, even from their own parents. Your sibling isn't doing their job.

I haven’t found much help from anyone I know, it’s always new and surprising in different ways to find out how shitty people are.

That’s why I’m really glad to have found you guys again..

2 minutes ago, Greatoneshere said:

 

 

I feel you brother. I'm the oldest brother of three and I realized at a young age that my parents were POS's so I sort of rallied my brothers for a long time and they saw the light. Unfortunately, many siblings emulate their shitty parents because they want their love, acceptance, or see their success as confirmation that they're doing things right (which is bullocks) so I'm sorry you don't have your sibling on your side.

 

I'll say this: stick around this board. You'll get a lot of love and support here if you're open and honest and that may help. You'll see.

That’s funny…Cause I’m the youngest of 3, and he’s the oldest, and it’s just as you said, he took her side cause she actually showed him love and attention and insane rewards and all of it…

1 hour ago, Greatoneshere said:

Welcome back! 

 

 

As a person who had to cut both of their parents out of their life (they are both terrible) a few years ago after having enough myself, both me and my two younger brothers said "fuck off" and have been all the better for it. Having a terrible mother is something only a few people understand and it sucks. I can relate, hang in there. The key is to become financially independent and move out. 

Amazing to see you guys again, seriously…Also, there was this heart shaped pillow made from one of my dads shirts after he died for me to treasure in my room still this morning …

My piece of shit father who threatened to break my arm if I wouldn’t peacefully go back in the hospital because I started crying when I tried to talk to him…Made from one of his disgusting hunting tee shirts that I hated…

So, I rubbed it around in the kitty litter before walking it out to the dumpster and spitting grossly on the floor as I walked away. Lol so, I’m with you on that.

except that my super rich brother refused to let me take a room in his giant empty mansion of a house in Colorado, but the details were too complicated and he couldn’t talk to me while I was in the hospital cause he was concerned about my mental state…

Sooo, it might be my whole family…

12 minutes ago, best3444 said:

Welcome back, man. Sorry to fuckin hear about your situation because that sounds awful. Keep your head up. 

Hey, I remember you, too! Lol No worries, my head is up. This whole thing has been uglier than I ever could’ve imagined.

Her favorite movie was always The Wizard of Oz, but, because she has never thought deeply on anything, ever, when I tried to show her dog Clair de Lune by DeBussy, she said “I know that song, it’s from Twilight!”….

It is very clear to me now that her favorite part of the movie was when Dorothy wakes up, and in her eyes I imagine it was like “oh, thank God that strange technicolor wonderland was just a bad dream and now I’m back in bumfuck Kansas with my racist mammy and pappy and all is right with the whole world. The  End.”

That’s gonna tickle me giddy for the rest of my days. Lol.

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Been drawing again, too.

45 minutes ago, Fizzzzle said:

We call these "character building exercises."

My character be built, boi.

1 hour ago, Nokra said:

Welcome back!  What's new with you?

It’s so awesome you guys are all still here, I remember all of you.

 I currently live in godawful Florida with my evil witch of a mother, but have just started looking into options to immediately remove myself from this situation and never speak to her again.

Last week she called the cops on me and falsely claimed I was having some kind of bipolar episode, and they arrested me without even asking my side of the story, and peacefully resisting did nothing, and I spent ANOTHER week locked in a psych ward because of her, and when I got home, my beautiful cat Norma, who is my only real love, was terrified and hiding and had tears in her eyes.

And I’ll never forgive her for this, she is a vile person.

But, other than that, I’m bountiful and spiffy. Lol

25 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

Let's see...it's only been four years since your last post and nothing much has changed around here

That boring, huh? lol