TyphoidHater Posted January 25, 2023 Share Posted January 25, 2023 Proud Boys 'rule book' revealed in trial sparks flurry of jokes, mockery WWW.NEWSWEEK.COM Five Proud Boys are on trial for rarely-used seditious conspiracy charges over their alleged involvement in the January 6, 2021, Capitol riot. The full book- https://s3.documentcloud.org/documents/23583878/proudboyssignup.pdf Highlights: 1st Degree- publicly declare "I am a Western chauvinist who refuses to apologize for creating the modern word" 2nd Degree- naming 5 breakfast cereals while being beaten confirmed and only masturbating once a month unless within 3 feet of a female non-prostitute 3rd Degree- proud Boys tattoo 4th Degree- engaging in a major conflict for the cause *Singing an awful song once a day, preferably in public with a jukebox backing you, is also recommended* UHURU!!! PROUD OF YOUR BOY!!!! Edit- just realized their theme song comes from the stage production of Aladdin and UHURU is a Swahili word and the name of The Uhuru Movement which is an American-based socialist and African internationalist movement founded in 1972 and led by the African People's Socialist Party (APSP) whose chairman is Omali Yeshitela 😂 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Posted January 25, 2023 Share Posted January 25, 2023 But shoving a dildo up your ass on live webcast is okay, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TyphoidHater Posted January 25, 2023 Author Share Posted January 25, 2023 6 minutes ago, Jason said: But shoving a dildo up your ass on live webcast is okay, right? As long as you don't ejaculate! *The above statement does not apply if a female non-prostitute was within 3 feet of you* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b_m_b_m_b_m Posted January 25, 2023 Share Posted January 25, 2023 None of this is new to me but: 19 minutes ago, TyphoidHater said: 1st Degree- publicly declare "I am a Western chauvinist who refuses to apologize for creating the modern word" lol buddy you and your fellow travelers are the inheritors of the modern world you didn’t create a goddamn thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silentbob Posted January 25, 2023 Share Posted January 25, 2023 All their rules there, um, sound kinda gay. How the hell do they/would they enforce that 2nd Degree rule there. Do they fire off a few rounds off from their other hand pistil instead. You know, when there no woman around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unogueen Posted January 25, 2023 Share Posted January 25, 2023 There is definitely an extended effort do defeat masculinity in the world, and these guys are leading the forefront. 1 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thewhyteboar Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 4 hours ago, silentbob said: All their rules there, um, sound kinda gay. Rule: You aren't supposed to jerk off, but if you do please deliver an oral report to your local unteroffizier detailing how exactly you jerked off, what grip you used, any props and/or foreign objects that were used, how much Western Seed of Liberty Juice was procured, what exactly you did with the Liberty Juice, and any tips or advice. A demonstration may be required. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kal-El814 Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 5 hours ago, TyphoidHater said: As long as you don't ejaculate! *The above statement does not apply if a female non-prostitute was within 3 feet of you* LOOPHOLE if you're within three feet of a female non-prostitute but ALSO surrounded by a bunch of dudes you get to jerk off with the boys! This is how we win. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thewhyteboar Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 7 minutes ago, Kal-El814 said: LOOPHOLE if you're within three feet of a female non-prostitute but ALSO surrounded by a bunch of dudes you get to jerk off with the boys! This is how we win. Hanging out enjoying classical art with the boys! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Air_Delivery Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 Balls not touching is a primal law handed down by father to son. As long as that doesn't occur its not gay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 1 hour ago, Air_Delivery said: Balls not touching is a primal law handed down by father to son. As long as that doesn't occur its not gay. What if it happens in the course of double teaming a female not-prostitute? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stepee Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 52 minutes ago, Jason said: What if it happens in the course of double teaming a female not-prostitute? look the point isn’t to find a work around for it the point is just to stop touching your dirty little no no place like a naughty boy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finaljedi Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 Naming breakfast cereals and singing Disney on Broadway songs are alpha as fuck. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silentbob Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 2 hours ago, Air_Delivery said: Balls not touching is a primal law handed down by father to son. As long as that doesn't occur its not gay. have you come to a ruling on Hot Tub situations yet? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 Nothing is more masculine than letting other guys define masculinity for you! You beta cuck liburls dont get it! 1 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 Reading this again is so pathetic, these guys are fucking losers. You wanna be a bad ass. Enlist. Uncle Sam always needs bodies. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uaarkson Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 Tough guy cosplay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 I would be rather amused by all of this if they weren't so actually dangerous. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reputator Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 7 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said: I would be rather amused by all of this if they weren't so actually dangerous. What strikes me is how unserious and anarchistic it is, like they think none of it really matters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 21 minutes ago, Reputator said: What strikes me is how unserious and anarchistic it is, like they think none of it really matters. Right-wing nihilism is perhaps its most dangerous form. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kal-El814 Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 21 minutes ago, Reputator said: What strikes me is how unserious and anarchistic it is, like they think none of it really matters. This shit is actually way more like “true believer” cult bullshit than the stuff you normally hear from right wing pundits. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 7 hours ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said: I would be rather amused by all of this if they weren't so actually dangerous. Eh, they’re not an actual threat, the moment they face actual opposition they’ll melt like the cowards they are. Theyll do damage yes, but destroying the country, no. When one of your leaders is a boot camp failure who is training you. Lol Remember they’re “stack” at the capital? Fucking pathetic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 5 hours ago, TUFKAK said: Eh, they’re not an actual threat, the moment they face actual opposition they’ll melt like the cowards they are. Theyll do damage yes, but destroying the country, no. When one of your leaders is a boot camp failure who is training you. Lol Remember they’re “stack” at the capital? Fucking pathetic. There are enough members of the various security services that are at least somewhat sympathetic to aspects of their ideology that they don't have to "destroy" the country to be a dangerous threat. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 8 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said: There are enough members of the various security services that are at least somewhat sympathetic to aspects of their ideology that they don't have to "destroy" the country to be a dangerous threat. I dont discount they can do damage, but that’s not a threat to me. Our nation has endured more and worse. The army of neck beards and incel losers isn’t overthrowing the republic I trust the armed services to correct itself and let’s not forget certain operators were on station during the coup. The info is out there now. If it had gone sideways, the play operators would’ve come face to face with real operators and that would’ve been fucking glorious. The people sympathetic to this worldview aren’t the ones who are in any way a threat. Again, boot camp washouts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 6 minutes ago, TUFKAK said: I dont discount they can do damage, but that’s not a threat to me. Our nation has endured more and worse. The army of neck beards and incel losers isn’t overthrowing the republic They don't need to overthrow it when they're already well-embedded in large swathes of the state security apparatus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unogueen Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 18 minutes ago, TUFKAK said: I dont discount they can do damage, but that’s not a threat to me. Our nation has endured more and worse. The army of neck beards and incel losers isn’t overthrowing the republic I trust the armed services to correct itself and let’s not forget certain operators were on station during the coup. The info is out there now. If it had gone sideways, the play operators would’ve come face to face with real operators and that would’ve been fucking glorious. The people sympathetic to this worldview aren’t the ones who are in any way a threat. Again, boot camp washouts. Buddy, any sane nation would have the insurrectionists strung up on the day or the day after. Where's the ambiguity? Why does there need to be an 'investigation'? I've lived in a few such lands and the answer is unequivocal. Revolution is not an empty value, they had goals in mind. There's no reason to goad more actions but here we are, eating shit on the daily. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 39 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said: They don't need to overthrow it when they're already well-embedded in large swathes of the state security apparatus. That threat is overplayed imo. Most service members are conservative, most conservatives aren’t traitors. There’s a distinction there that has significant merit. These groups are cosplaying operators, they’re a fucking joke to even the most boot ass marine who knows how that form a stack Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unogueen Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 4 minutes ago, TUFKAK said: That threat is overplayed imo. Most service members are conservative, most conservatives aren’t traitors. There’s a distinction there that has significant merit. These groups are cosplaying operators, they’re a fucking joke to even the most boot ass marine who knows how that form a stack The security apparatus is about protecting 'value'. Humans are way down the list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 30 minutes ago, unogueen said: Buddy, any sane nation would have the insurrectionists strung up on the day or the day after. Where's the ambiguity? Why does there need to be an 'investigation'? I've lived in a few such lands and the answer is unequivocal. Revolution is not an empty value, they had goals in mind. There's no reason to goad more actions but here we are, eating shit on the daily. Because, to paraphrase a Star Trek episode, such arguments are the age old cry of the oppressor. I do not want to live in a nation where the state can just unequivocally claim citizens as combatants. Internal security or not Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar SFLUFAN Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 9 minutes ago, TUFKAK said: That threat is overplayed imo. The state security apparatus consists of more than service members. Furthermore, the "threat" to the republic need not necessarily be one of action as "inaction" on the part of those individuals can also produce roughly the same result. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unogueen Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 18 minutes ago, TUFKAK said: Because, to paraphrase a Star Trek episode, such arguments are the age old cry of the oppressor. I do not want to live in a nation where the state can just unequivocally claim citizens as combatants. Internal security or not They ARE the state. Your broken 2 party system suggests there's a clear answer but each one is shit. With a multiparty system you would recognize the true madness of humanity and make a better decision of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUFKAK Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 1 hour ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said: The state security apparatus consists of more than service members. Furthermore, the "threat" to the republic need not necessarily be one of action as "inaction" on the part of those individuals can also produce roughly the same result. If we’re discussing a full breakdown of norms, no offense, analysts and pencil pushers aren’t changing shit, they can stay off the 295 and do nothing. It will be those shouldering rifles that force change Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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