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Five Proud Boys are on trial for rarely-used seditious conspiracy charges over their alleged involvement in the January 6, 2021, Capitol riot.

 

The full book- 

 

https://s3.documentcloud.org/documents/23583878/proudboyssignup.pdf

 

Highlights:

 

1st Degree- publicly declare "I am a Western chauvinist who refuses to apologize for creating the modern word"

 

2nd Degree- naming 5 breakfast cereals while being beaten confirmed and only masturbating once a month unless within 3 feet of a female non-prostitute

 

3rd Degree- proud Boys tattoo

 

4th Degree- engaging in a major conflict for the cause

 

*Singing an awful song once a day, preferably in public with a jukebox backing you, is also recommended*

 

 

UHURU!!!  PROUD OF YOUR BOY!!!!

 

 

Edit- just realized their theme song comes from the stage production of Aladdin and UHURU is a Swahili word and the name of  The Uhuru Movement which is an American-based socialist and African internationalist movement founded in 1972 and led by the African People's Socialist Party (APSP) whose chairman is Omali Yeshitela 😂

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4 hours ago, silentbob said:

All their rules there, um, sound kinda gay.

 

Rule: You aren't supposed to jerk off, but if you do please deliver an oral report to your local unteroffizier detailing how exactly you jerked off, what grip you used, any props and/or foreign objects that were used, how much Western Seed of Liberty Juice was procured, what exactly you did with the Liberty Juice, and any tips or advice. A demonstration may be required.

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5 hours ago, TyphoidHater said:

 

As long as you don't ejaculate!

 

*The above statement does not apply if a female non-prostitute was within 3 feet of you*

 

LOOPHOLE if you're within three feet of a female non-prostitute but ALSO surrounded by a bunch of dudes you get to jerk off with the boys! This is how we win.

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7 hours ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

I would be rather amused by all of this if they weren't so actually dangerous.

Eh, they’re not an actual threat, the moment they face actual opposition they’ll melt like the cowards they are.

 

Theyll do damage yes, but destroying the country, no. When one of your leaders is a boot camp failure who is training you. Lol

 

Remember they’re “stack” at the capital? Fucking pathetic.

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5 hours ago, TUFKAK said:

Eh, they’re not an actual threat, the moment they face actual opposition they’ll melt like the cowards they are.

 

Theyll do damage yes, but destroying the country, no. When one of your leaders is a boot camp failure who is training you. Lol

 

Remember they’re “stack” at the capital? Fucking pathetic.

 

 

There are enough members of the various security services that are at least somewhat sympathetic to aspects of their ideology that they don't have to "destroy" the country to be a dangerous threat.

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8 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

 

 

There are enough members of the various security services that are at least somewhat sympathetic to aspects of their ideology that they don't have to "destroy" the country to be a dangerous threat.

I dont discount they can do damage, but that’s not a threat to me. Our nation has endured more and worse. The army of neck beards and incel losers isn’t overthrowing the republic 

 

I trust the armed services to correct itself and let’s not forget certain operators were on station during the coup. The info is out there now. If it had gone sideways, the play operators would’ve come face to face with real operators and that would’ve been fucking glorious.

 

The people sympathetic to this worldview aren’t the ones who are in any way a threat. Again, boot camp washouts.

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6 minutes ago, TUFKAK said:

I dont discount they can do damage, but that’s not a threat to me. Our nation has endured more and worse. The army of neck beards and incel losers isn’t overthrowing the republic 

 

They don't need to overthrow it when they're already well-embedded in large swathes of the state security apparatus.

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18 minutes ago, TUFKAK said:

I dont discount they can do damage, but that’s not a threat to me. Our nation has endured more and worse. The army of neck beards and incel losers isn’t overthrowing the republic 

 

I trust the armed services to correct itself and let’s not forget certain operators were on station during the coup. The info is out there now. If it had gone sideways, the play operators would’ve come face to face with real operators and that would’ve been fucking glorious.

 

The people sympathetic to this worldview aren’t the ones who are in any way a threat. Again, boot camp washouts.

Buddy, any sane nation would have the insurrectionists strung up on the day or the day after. Where's the ambiguity? Why does there need to be an 'investigation'? I've lived in a few such lands and the answer is unequivocal. Revolution is not an empty value, they had goals in mind. There's no reason to goad more actions but here we are, eating shit on the daily.

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39 minutes ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

 

They don't need to overthrow it when they're already well-embedded in large swathes of the state security apparatus.

That threat is overplayed imo. Most service members are conservative, most conservatives aren’t traitors. There’s a distinction there that has significant merit.

 

These groups are cosplaying operators, they’re a fucking joke to even the most boot ass marine who knows how that form a stack 

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4 minutes ago, TUFKAK said:

That threat is overplayed imo. Most service members are conservative, most conservatives aren’t traitors. There’s a distinction there that has significant merit.

 

These groups are cosplaying operators, they’re a fucking joke to even the most boot ass marine who knows how that form a stack 

The security apparatus is about protecting 'value'. Humans are way down the list.

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30 minutes ago, unogueen said:

Buddy, any sane nation would have the insurrectionists strung up on the day or the day after. Where's the ambiguity? Why does there need to be an 'investigation'? I've lived in a few such lands and the answer is unequivocal. Revolution is not an empty value, they had goals in mind. There's no reason to goad more actions but here we are, eating shit on the daily.

Because, to paraphrase a Star Trek episode, such arguments are the age old cry of the oppressor. I do not want to live in a nation where the state can just unequivocally claim citizens as combatants.

 

Internal security or not 

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18 minutes ago, TUFKAK said:

Because, to paraphrase a Star Trek episode, such arguments are the age old cry of the oppressor. I do not want to live in a nation where the state can just unequivocally claim citizens as combatants.

 

Internal security or not 

They ARE the state. Your broken 2 party system suggests there's a clear answer but each one is shit. With a multiparty system you would recognize the true madness of humanity and make a better decision of it.

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1 hour ago, Commissar SFLUFAN said:

 

The state security apparatus consists of more than service members.

 

Furthermore, the "threat" to the republic need not necessarily be one of action as "inaction" on the part of those individuals can also produce roughly the same result.

If we’re discussing a full breakdown of norms, no offense, analysts and pencil pushers aren’t changing shit, they can stay off the 295 and do nothing. It will be those shouldering rifles that force change 

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