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Chris-
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I am well. I have off tomorrow for MLK, Jr. Day, and we're in the midst of a fairly large snow storm (anywhere from 7-9"), so we're snowed in and watching the Steelers game. Woke up this morning and played some Metroid Dread while I had my coffee, made breakfast and cleaned up, did my training and certification for my volunteer tax program, FaceTime'd with my fiancé's cousins, then made dinner (homemade pepperoni pizza and Korean fried popcorn chicken). Opened a bottle of wine, more Metroid while watching the Cowboys/49ers, leading up to now. All in all a wonderful day.

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Ate entirely too much Dominos, punishing myself with food because why not? Playing The Outer Wilds, a game that I constantly feel like I’m on the verge of cracking, but progress is slow because my brain is even foggier than normal. Had a better than average weekend at work, hoping it doesn’t snow too much tonight because I have to work in the morning.  And then I’ll have my days off, in which I’ll be too tired and lazy to even have fun. 

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I slept like 14 hours, it was pretty great (been really busy, working 10-10 the last 3 days, I was exhausted). I didn't get out of bed until almost 4pm. I'm off tomorrow as well, and there isn't really anything I *have* to get done this weekend, so... Probably going to finish watching Da Vinci's Demons tonight, probably going to get some pizza or something and just do some grade-A hard chillin' until I have to go back to work Tuesday afternoon. With the occasional 2-hour binge playing Super Auto Pets.

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Had a pretty relaxed day. We went to Hollywood Studios a little after noon, had some quick lunch and then went to enjoy some attractions. The Minnie/Mickey ride (some of the most incredible projection mapping and warping stuff ever deployed), then watched the Beauty and the Beast Live show, the Indiana Jones Stunt show, Star Tours, and then Rise of the Resistance (an OK ride, but what makes it absolutely phenomenal and worth the extra $15 per person not to wait in line is the immersive experience). We went back to the resort and the kids went to the pool for a couple of hours while Juanita and I took a nap.

 

I ended up watching some of the Cowboys/Niners game before heading out to dinner. The Steelers/KC game was on at the restaurant, so Juanita and I enjoyed seeing the offensive pervert Andy Reid draw up all the nasty plays he could think of. Now back in the hotel room and going to do some of my end of the weekend theater work.

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I'm ok. Wanting my house renovations to finish so I can move in. I also want to buy a laptop but feel like I should wait for Gen 13 Intels or the new MacBook. I went to the gym, seeing a lot of progress. I think this is the year I might hit attractive body status since I began this journey. 

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I’ve had a great weekend. Thursday and Friday were shocking as the same viral infection my wife/daughter had, got me on and I ended up taking the end of the week off due to illness. As it involved a horrendous headache I didn’t so much more than lie down on the sofa/in bed feeling awful. So, we made up for it by going to the beach on Saturday and a botanical garden on Sunday. Both were lovely. I also did some reading and some cleaning which also sorts me out.

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Honestly a pretty good weekend. A mix of chilling and working. I feel a little “weird” and “disconnected” at times with some minor existential dread and anxiety but it’s pretty mild for me. It’s hard not to hone in on those things though but I am keeping perspective that I’m feeling more good than bad by a long shot, and this is a massive improvement for me.

 

Overall I’m functional and stable all things considered. Im still processing everything I’ve been through in the last year and still in the midst of trauma therapy but it’s going well. I’ve come a long way and I’ve got some more to go too. I’ve been dabbling in working with a WFH job and some Uber eats and I feel good about that. It’s nice to feel well enough to do that. Did some therapy homework today and played Stardew with my man and we watched some Full House (been watching that to mourn Bob Saget </3). Also had some good sex today and some Trader Joe’s beef and broccoli. Overall today I enjoyed myself, which is all you can ask for in this life.
 

Thanks for asking Chrisothy 

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It's going absolutely awful. I won't annoy you guys with the details but I'm seeing 4 different therapist shortly. My first appointment is for grief relief at 11am today. The only good thing is I'm enjoying gaming still and have off this entire week.

 

What a life.

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2 hours ago, best3444 said:

It's going absolutely awful. I won't annoy you guys with the details but I'm seeing 4 different therapist shortly. My first appointment is for grief relief at 11am today. The only good thing is I'm enjoying gaming still and have off this entire week.

 

What a life.


Let me know how that meeting goes. 
 

Be nice to yourself. You’re struggling. It sucks but it’s okay not to be okay. You’ve been through a lot and it makes sense you’re having a hard time. You’re strong too. So happy that you are embracing and accepting some help. Things can get better. 

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2 hours ago, Rachel said:


Let me know how that meeting goes. 
 

Be nice to yourself. You’re struggling. It sucks but it’s okay not to be okay. You’ve been through a lot and it makes sense you’re having a hard time. You’re strong too. So happy that you are embracing and accepting some help. Things can get better. 

 

Not to go into much detail but the session lasted an hour and a half and it was emotionally draining. I let everything out and cried a lot, too. She was excellent and gave me a book to read. I see her in 2 weeks and I'm seeing a psychologist tomorrow at 2pm. This guy offers individual therapy and once a month group sessions. 

 

Thanks for your post and encouragement. 

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15 hours ago, Joe said:

Apparently having a side effect to the TDAP vaccine?! My stomach is cramping hardcore.


Is that due to the birth coming up? I think that became standard procedure after we were done having kids as I think both of my brothers had to get TDAP boosters prior to their kids being born, which have all been in the last 5 years

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6 hours ago, best3444 said:

 

Not to go into much detail but the session lasted an hour and a half and it was emotionally draining. I let everything out and cried a lot, too. She was excellent and gave me a book to read. I see her in 2 weeks and I'm seeing a psychologist tomorrow at 2pm. This guy offers individual therapy and once a month group sessions. 

 

Thanks for your post and encouragement. 


Therapy is rough as hell sometimes. It can be like that. It’s hard to face all that pain but it will be better for you in the long run. I’m glad you were able to express yourself and cry and get some support and resources. Hopefully you connect well with tomorrow’s psychologist. Let me know how that goes too. Overall this is a great thing that you are embracing this help I am very happy for you. And yes it’s hard and emotionally draining too. Just keep taking one small step at a time and remember to be gentle with yourself.  

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6 hours ago, sblfilms said:


Is that due to the birth coming up? I think that became standard procedure after we were done having kids as I think both of my brothers had to get TDAP boosters prior to their kids being born, which have all been in the last 5 years


Yep! We’re making all our close relatives get it, too.

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1 minute ago, Joe said:


Yep! We’re making all our close relatives get it, too.


Good. Toss off to any family member who refuses. My brother’s MIL was a real anti-vaxxer (and a flippin’ RN!) and eventually relented when my SIL told her mom flat out she couldn’t see the baby unless she did.

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