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Does my vagina look like a 14 year old's vagina?


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#1 madmankevin

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 12:27 PM

^^^That's what a stripper asked me last night. :/

Of course she started laughing when I said "What in the hell kind of a question is that?"  Apparently the dj a few nights back said "Welcome and put your hands together for Ruby and her amazing 14 year old vagina" as she was coming on stage.

I'm not a regular at strip clubs, but it's always nice getting a few friends together to help put the less fortunate through college.  Let's open this up to weird strip club stories.  I know you guys have them! :]

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#2 Boyle5150

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 12:28 PM

I leave disappointed.
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#3 gamer.tv

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 12:30 PM

I chatted to a stripper in a strip club when I was hammered for about 30 minutes not realising all the double entendre's she was throwing about the place. She received no business from me.

...and it's ending one minute at a time.


#4 Shappy

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 12:32 PM

Never been to a strip club. :\
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#5 Runny

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 12:38 PM

Only been to strip clubs twice. I learned quick that you need to turn down your first few offers for a lap dance. But I was soooo weak. I got the worst lap dance for $20 ever

#6 Kyio

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 12:40 PM

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#7 brazil201

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:14 PM

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#8 Boyle5150

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:17 PM

wtf is wrong with you Brazil?
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#9 Runny

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:18 PM

View PostBoyle5150, on 18 February 2012 - 01:17 PM, said:

wtf is wrong with you Brazil?


#10 Giger's Predator

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:19 PM

View Postbrazil201, on 18 February 2012 - 01:14 PM, said:

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dude u look hella fine there
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#11 brazil201

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:21 PM

one of my "friends" on facebook posted that lol. Made me think of this topic.
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#12 Boyle5150

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:23 PM

View Postbrazil201, on 18 February 2012 - 01:21 PM, said:

"friends" .
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#13 Dorkter

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:24 PM

The one and only time I went to a strip club, a really obnoxious stripper came over and sat on my leg and talked about her dreams of opening a dog grooming studio while grabbing at my junk, until she realized I had no interest in a private show. When she got up, there was a visible and sizable wet spot on my shorts from where she was sitting. I felt like I needed to boil my leg in bleach, and then burn those shorts in an incinerator that also had bleach in it.

#14 jacoby

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:37 PM

She was an undercover police officer. If you said yes, she would have placed you under arrest.
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#15 Starscream

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:37 PM

I went to a strip club and this stripper wanted to take me to a private room. I was dating my wife at the time so I kept saying no. So she brought over the bouncer and he was grabbing me and trying to push me with her to the room. I was like fuck this and left.

#16 Jason

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:38 PM

View PostStarscream, on 18 February 2012 - 01:37 PM, said:

I went to a strip club and this stripper wanted to take me to a private room. I was dating my wife at the time so I kept saying no. So she brought over the bouncer and he was grabbing me and trying to push me with her to the room. I was like fuck this and left.

That makes so much business sense. Being dragged into a room by a bouncer is totally the right way to get you in the mood!

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#17 Dre801

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 01:43 PM

i haven't been to one in ages and have no desire to go at this point.  I'm a pretty lousy strip club patron anyway since i typically spend the who time telling those broads 'no thanks' to their lapdance offers.  I turned down pretty much every chick in the place once, and eventually they all gave me this, "are you gay or something?" look.  :lol:
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#18 baserock love

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 02:50 PM

I have a stripper story.  I banged my neighbors absurdly hot cousin who was a stripper than didn't show up to her birthday party the next day.  My roommate/best friend at the time who was one of the biggest morons in history asked me if he could have a go at her and i said go for it so he showed up instead of me and hit on her all night.

It may sound dick but it's a long story, i was honestly shocked to find out she actually wanted me to go and was pretty upset when i didn't.
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#19 SexyAlf

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 03:06 PM

I had a lap dance once.

I was working for the Blitz in 2001 and we had a football promotion for Bud at Columbus Gold.  I was out there with one of the female DJ's.  We were doing the promotion and one of the strippers came up to me and told me to sit down.  So, I did and she started flapping her ass in my face and pushing her boobs at me...  I was mortified.  After a song's worth of that she smiled and walked away.  The DJ I was working with asked me how that was, and told me she paid em 20 bucks to do it.

I didn't work with her again.

I'm not saying the stripper wasn't attractive.  But she fluffed her ass in my face.  FLUFFED her ASS in my face.  It was absolutely disgusting.  I came there to work, already grossed out at the fact that every time I looked up there was going to be shaven twat and saggy tits in my line of sight... and then this woman fluffs her assy ass in my face.

#20 DarkStar189

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 04:26 PM

I only went to a strip club once and it was a pretty sweet time to be honest.  My friends and I were shocked at how nice the place was and the girls were actually smoking hot.

#21 Chairslinger

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 04:50 PM

We were doing the promotion and one of the strippers came up to me and told me to sit down. So, I did and she started flapping her ass in my face and pushing her boobs at me... I was mortified.


I just thought this quote deserved a little more attention.

#22 BlueAngel

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 04:59 PM

I once went to a strip club where I was allowed to touch, it was weird considering every strip club I went to before didn't allow it. Had this hot ass blonde with high b cups and a nice ass, she had to have been maybe 19 at best so firm and tight. That's my only good story really.
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#23 BIGBISCUIT

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 05:06 PM

It doesn't feel right though does it? The whole thing just feels wrong.
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#24 vaxick

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 05:28 PM

I went to one once and we I walked inside, instead of a girl on the stage, DAngelo was there.  I then walked out.
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#25 SexyAlf

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 05:30 PM

View PostChairslinger, on 18 February 2012 - 04:50 PM, said:

We were doing the promotion and one of the strippers came up to me and told me to sit down. So, I did and she started flapping her ass in my face and pushing her boobs at me... I was mortified.


I just thought this quote deserved a little more attention.

It was disgusting.  I wouldn't even let a dude stripper do that.  Ugghh...

#26 SilverShadow

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 08:56 PM

View Postvaxick, on 18 February 2012 - 05:28 PM, said:

I went to one once and we I walked inside, instead of a girl on the stage, DAngelo was there.  I then walked out.
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#27 BIGBISCUIT

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:02 PM

Sounds like he went to DeAngelo's Dungeon.
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#28 NeoJoe

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:06 PM

Why did I click this thread? WHY?!?
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#29 brazil201

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:10 PM

There'a a strip club by Kean University in New Jersey where you can touch the strippers. This one girl put her hands through my shorts and touched my dick. I came
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#30 The def star

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:12 PM

I work at a strip club and no not as a dancer. I DJ there during the week so I have plenty of stories. Believe me when I say that strippers are some of the most interesting people I have come across, lol.
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#31 brazil201

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:14 PM

View PostThe def star, on 18 February 2012 - 09:12 PM, said:

I work at a strip club and no not as a dancer. I DJ there during the week so I have plenty of stories. Believe me when I say that strippers are some of the most interesting people I have come across, lol.

I have so much respect for you. I now want to DJ a strip club
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#32 Lucian04

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:16 PM

There is a distinct lack of 14 year old vagina in this topic.
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#33 BIGBISCUIT

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:17 PM

View PostThe def star, on 18 February 2012 - 09:12 PM, said:

I work at a strip club and no not as a dancer. I DJ there during the week so I have plenty of stories. Believe me when I say that strippers are some of the most interesting people I have come across, lol.

Yeah, funny how naked women catch our interest.
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#34 The def star

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:25 PM

Well I like to tell people that strippers are damn fun if you get to hang out with them. They are straight shooters and will tell you up front what they like. No need to play no guessing games. They are cool as hell but don't ever think you can have a normal relationship with one. There is a reason why they are dancing for money lol.
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#35 BIGBISCUIT

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Posted 18 February 2012 - 09:28 PM

I am sure most strippers look to settle down if they can. Surely they don't like doing that. Well, I guess some of them do.
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